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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table below gives information about population in Australia and Malaysia in 1980 and 2002. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The table below gives information about population in Australia and Malaysia in 1980 and 2002. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#information #population #australia #malaysia #summarise #features #comparisons
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ven table chart illustrates information concerning the
population
Use synonyms
 of two different countries (
Australia
Use synonyms
 and
Malaysia
Use synonyms
) for the years 1980 and 2002. Looking at the
overall
Linking Words
 perspective, it is readily apparent that the total
population
Use synonyms
 increased in both countries and there are a little changes in all the articles. A cursory glance at the data reveals that
Australia
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 and
Malaysia
Use synonyms
 increased their total populations. In the year 1980, there were 14.7
million
Use synonyms
 and 13.7
million
Use synonyms
, respectively
while
Linking Words
, in the year 2002, the statistics were 19.6
million
Use synonyms
 and 24.3
million
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, respectively.
Also
Linking Words
, another eye-catching trend is that
two
Correct article usage
the two
show examples
 countries' gender populations were similar for the given years. In
Australia
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, male and female
population
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 percentages maintained the same level accounting for 49.9% and 50.1%, respectively.
Also
Linking Words
, in
Malaysia
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,
male
Add an article
the male
show examples
population
Use synonyms
 increased by 0.3%
while
Linking Words
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
female
Correct article usage
the female
show examples
population
Use synonyms
 slightly declined by 0.3%. A more detailed look at the graph reveals that the birth rate gradually decreased from 1.2% to 1.3% in
Australia
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 and by 3.2% to 2.2% in
Malaysia
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.
In contrast
Linking Words
, average annual
population
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 growth soared by 0.1%
however
Linking Words
, in
Malaysia
Use synonyms
 dropped by 0.3%.
Submitted by wowoo04066 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, while".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words population, australia, malaysia, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
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