Many young children have unsupervised access to the internet and are using the internet to socialize with others. What problems do children face when going online withobut parental supervision? How can these problems be solved?

The online engagement rate of teenagers on social platforms has
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased
from
Change preposition
in
show examples
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
few years.
However
, some
children
use these sites without
Correct pronoun usage
their parents
show examples
parents
Change noun form
parents'
parent's
show examples
supervision which can numerous
problems
in their lives. In
this
essay, I will discuss those issues and
provides
Correct subject-verb agreement
provide
show examples
measures to solve them. To commence with the
problems
, it is very common for
children
to come across
among
Change preposition
apply
show examples
strangers, who can influence them negatively. It is very easy to target
children
as they are not aware of bad people who are active on social websites and can use them for their own welfare like
misguide
Wrong verb form
misguiding
show examples
them to send their nude photos, share inappropriate content etc. These actions not on
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
them mentally but
also
physically. If
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
online
abusing
Replace the word
abuse
show examples
goes over the limit, sometimes
children
prefer to commit suicide rather than
sharing
Wrong verb form
share
show examples
it with
parents
Correct pronoun usage
their parents
show examples
.
Besides
this
, social activation is
waste
Correct article usage
a waste
show examples
of time.
Although
, teens know it but still spend most of their time
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
scorlling
Correct your spelling
scrolling
Instagram, TikTok,
Correct word choice
and
show examples
Facebook.
This
activation hinders their physical growth
as well as
affects their studies. Since the invention of
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
, individuals
do
Verb problem
have
show examples
lack
Replace the word
lacked
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
exercise as compared to before. It is causing so many health
problems
such
as heart diseases, blood
pressures
Fix the agreement mistake
pressure
show examples
, respiratory
problems
etcetera.
Movingfurther
Correct your spelling
Moving further
towards the solution of all these issues, first and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
foremost is that parents should monitor their kids.
The
Correct your spelling
They
show examples
should keep an eye on activities that they perform online.
In addition
, they should try to build a transparent relationship with their
children
, so that they do not hesitate to share their
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
.
Moreover
, they can act as a role model for their
children
by indulging themselves in good habits like less usage of mobile
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
show examples
,
spend
Wrong verb form
spending
show examples
quality time with family,
read
Wrong verb form
reading
show examples
books ,
exercise
Wrong verb form
exercising
show examples
, yoga, meditation and so on. In
this
way, they can protect
children
from
claws
Correct article usage
the claws
show examples
of
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
.
To conclude
,
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
is invented for the sake of people.
Children
should use it in limit and
parent
Fix the agreement mistake
parents
show examples
should supervise them,
while
their juveniles are using it.
Submitted by lovekirandeepk on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure
Try to keep your essay organized with clear paragraphs. Each paragraph should focus on a single main idea, introduced with a topic sentence.
Sentence Structure
In your essay, ensure that you are using a variety of sentence structures effectively. This can enhance the readability and sophistication of your writing.
Development
Work on developing your ideas more comprehensively by providing specific examples and explanations. This adds depth to your essay and makes your arguments more convincing.
Accuracy
Pay attention to spelling, punctuation, and grammar. Minor mistakes can distract from the quality of your argument.
Vocabulary
Consider expanding your vocabulary to include more precise and sophisticated language. This can make your essay more engaging and demonstrate a higher level of English proficiency.
Topic Relevance
You have effectively addressed the topic and provided relevant arguments and solutions.
Structure
Your essay structure, including an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, is well-organized.
Grammar
You've demonstrated good control of basic grammar and punctuation.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: