You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Nowadays celebrities earn more money than politicians. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or negative development? You should write at least 250 words.

Thesedays
Correct your spelling
These days
, it has
ben
Correct your spelling
been
show examples
noticed that public figures are been paid well compared to government
officals
Correct your spelling
officials
and
this
can be
due to
the benefit of social media platforms and the attention they receive that allows them to get both national and
intenation
Correct your spelling
international
contracts. I think
this
is a positive development because it will encourage more people to go into professions that
attracts
Change the verb form
attract
show examples
fame
such
as the entertainment industry
Firstly
, celebrities earn more money than politicians because youngsters
which
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
are lovers of online sites
such
as
Youtube
Correct your spelling
YouTube
show examples
, Facebook, Instagram and
tiktalk
Correct your spelling
TalkTalk
Correct your spelling
usually
usally
Correct your spelling
usually
go to these platforms to watch their videos or look at their pictures and some even go as far as subscribing to their page or channels so that they will be notified any time they either post a video or a picture or they are live online
aube
Change the capitalization
Aube
show examples
and there has attracted
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
of income
becave
Correct your spelling
became
because
all thee applications are paying them
masively
Correct your spelling
massively
for
farly
Correct your spelling
fairly
a
aduuts
Correct your spelling
adults
the applications they we the how long they gand on these sites showed
thed
Correct your spelling
the
Most
Paple
Correct your spelling
People
go on
entertainmats
Correct your spelling
entertainments
entertainment
sites mostly and
sameling
Correct your spelling
sampling
sailing
up to 12home in a day a day
Submitted by ayodelesam.adebisi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Language accuracy
Make sure to proofread your essay to correct spelling and grammatical errors, such as 'thesedays', 'been paid well', and 'aduuts'. Correct spelling supports clearer communication of your ideas.
Task Response
You introduced an interesting perspective on why celebrities might earn more than politicians, focusing on the influence of social media. However, support your points with more specific examples and data to strengthen your argument.
Structure
Using clear paragraphing can help improve the organization of your ideas. Consider dividing your essay into distinct sections such as an introduction, several body paragraphs detailing your main points, and a conclusion.
Cohesion
To make your essay more coherent, connect your ideas using linking words and phrases. This will help transition smoothly between points and make your argument more persuasive.
Conclusion
Expand on your conclusion by summarizing your main points and restating your opinion clearly. This will provide a strong finish to your essay.
Topic relevance
You have tackled a modern and relevant topic, discussing the impact of social media on celebrities' earnings compared to politicians.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!