In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

There is a commonplace case in which some people from any state on all continents prefer to leave suburbs to relocate to urban areas
hence
the number of inhabitants of the village is diminishing. In my opinion,
this
phenomenon has advantages not only economic benefits but
also
human experience. Citizens who move to metropolitan areas can get some exposure to vacancies mostly in industry places
such
as big companies, consulting, and other firms.
For instance
, I live in Indonesia so Jakarta is the capital city. So many folks in Java come to Jakarta to find any kind of job mainly a professional job in finance, marketing, and some role related to the business field since the majority of the company head office is located in that. They have a purpose why they want to pursue a career in company headquarters because of flourishing career path.
Afterward
Change the spelling
Afterwards
show examples
, it is not only about career path but
also
about higher salary. Some people think if they could work in the city they would make more money so not only for saving but
also
for investing. The textbook
also
mentions “Money isn’t everything, but the experience is everything” so that quote means an individual always needs a new experience to feel alive. In the village, they cannot gain some new insight because of the homogenous situations between them. Despite
this
, when they go outside from their original place of birth, they can feel a new atmosphere around a variety of races which can enhance curiosity and knowledge of different cultures. In conclusion, wage conditions and curiosity are two main reasons why I am inclined several mankind to concentrate downtown.
Submitted by damayanti.nsd on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear distinction between paragraphs with one main idea per paragraph for better clarity.
coherence cohesion
Use transitional phrases to smoothly connect ideas and paragraphs, enhancing readability.
coherence cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structures to keep your writing engaging and dynamic.
task achievement
To strengthen your argument, it might be beneficial to acknowledge potential counterarguments briefly.
task achievement
When providing examples, ensure they are specific and directly support your main points for added effectiveness.
task achievement
You've provided a clear opinion on the issue, which is crucial for task achievement.
task achievement
Your essay contains relevant examples which help to solidify your arguments.
coherence cohesion
The structure of your essay, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, supports its coherence and cohesion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • rural-to-urban migration
  • population shift
  • positive impact
  • negative impact
  • urbanization
  • job opportunities
  • access to education
  • access to healthcare
  • urban infrastructure
  • rural traditions
  • cultural heritage
What to do next:
Look at other essays: