Having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having more free time. Discuss both views and state your opinion.

#money #time

this

contemporary era, people are exposed

with

Change preposition

show examples

options regarding

correlation

Add an article

the correlation

show examples

between

time

and

money

. Some believe that they rather earn more

money

with the consequence of less free

time

because they do not have to worry about uncertainty in the future. Unfortunately, the opponents argue that leisure

time

with

loves

Wrong verb form

loved

show examples

one

Correct pronoun usage

ones

show examples

are

Change the verb form

show examples

more worth it than

money

Therefore

this

essay will delve deeper

about

Change preposition

into

show examples

merit

Correct article usage

the merit

show examples

and demerits of each stance. Individuals who support chasing

money

than vacant

time

presume that

money

is a vital instrument to survive in

this

era. If they do not have

money

than

Replace the word

then

show examples

they are not privileged to get better and faster facilities

such

health

, transportation, and education.

Additionally

, some supporters might currently become

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

breadwinner

Fix the agreement mistake

breadwinners

show examples

, forcing them to work harder to put

a food

Remove the article

food

a portion of food

show examples

on the table for themselves and their

family

Fix the agreement mistake

families

show examples

This

kind of group values

money

over free

time

. Those opinions are completely compelling arguments

againts

Correct your spelling

against

the opponents. People pursuing leisure

time

than

Rephrase

rather than

show examples

money

argue that spending

time

with acquaintances

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

more valuable than earning

abundant

Add an article

the abundant

an abundant

show examples

amount of

money

For instance

, creating moments with children will be everlasting than having

money

and it is somehow a period that can be repeated.

Besides

, they argue that working overtime will cost

health

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

and mental illness, leading to

adding

Replace the word

additional

show examples

another

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

spending

for

Change preposition

show examples

health

. It surely may cost astronomically since the

treatement

Correct your spelling

treatment

requires professional. Those are strong reasons why spending

time

are

Change the verb form

show examples

more worth it. After discussing two stances, my inclination

alligns

Correct your spelling

aligns

align

with the proponents because we have to prepare for the uncertainty.

However

, it is better to prioritise our

health

and mental well-being over

money

by having a day off routine so that we do not get bored with the hustle

bustle

Correct word choice

and bustle

show examples

Submitted by websiteonlyforme on Wed Apr 10 2024

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Introduction

Make sure to introduce your main points in the introduction to give the reader an overview of what to expect.

Coherence & Cohesion

To enhance clarity and cohesion, it's helpful to use a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more smoothly.

Task Achievement

Try to include more specific examples or evidence to support your arguments, which will help to achieve a more comprehensive and persuasive response.

General

Remember to proofread your essay to correct small typos or errors, as these can distract from your overall message.

Balanced Discussion

You've provided a well-balanced discussion on both views, effectively acknowledging the merits and demerits of each.

Conclusion

Your conclusion effectively summarizes your opinion based on the arguments presented, showing clear task achievement.

Structure

The logical structure of your essay is strong, with clear progression from the introduction, through your main points, to a cohesive conclusion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
24Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

289 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

financial security
facilitating
lifestyle
professional development
increased stress
work-life balance
hobbies
quality time
physical and mental health
financial constraints
luxury items
overall well-being
personal growth
middle ground
sacrificing

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Having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having more free time. Discuss both views and state your opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Technology has developed very fast over the past 100 years. However, some people think that technological progress has brought negative effects on the humanity. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some believe that students should begin learning a language very early in school while others think these subjects should be taught later. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

In many countries today, women have full-time jobs. Therefore, it is reasonable to share housework equally between men and women.To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

propaganda poster of isis Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of the phenomenon.

Homelessness is increasing in many major cities around the world. What do you think are the main causes of this problem and measures could be taken to solve it?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+