IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Australian household. The second chart shows the greenhouse gas emissions which result from this energy use. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Australian household. The second chart shows the greenhouse gas emissions which result from this energy use. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The given charts provide information about
Use synonyms
energy
Correct article usage
the energy
show examples
 uses of an
Avarage
Correct your spelling
average
 Australian household and greenhouse
gas
Use synonyms
 emissions which result from
energy
Use synonyms
 uses.
Overall
Linking Words
, from the given charts,
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
Use synonyms
energy used
Add a hyphen
energy-used
show examples
 appliance in Australian
household
Fix the agreement mistake
households
show examples
 was heating
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
 42%, but, from the second
chart
Use synonyms
,
water
Use synonyms
 heating
resulted
Add the preposition
resulted in
resulted from
show examples
 most
gas
Use synonyms
 emissions with 32% which used 30% of
energy
Use synonyms
 use.
Firstly
Linking Words
, from the first
chart
Use synonyms
, heating was the most
energy
Use synonyms
 used unit with 42%, after heating,
water
Use synonyms
 heating which was 30% and other appliances with 15% comes in.
While
Linking Words
 heating,
water
Use synonyms
 heating and other appliances
used
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
 more than 10% of Australian household
energy
Use synonyms
, refrigeration 7%, lightning 4% and cooling 2% these units are all below 10% uses of
energy
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, from the second
chart
Use synonyms
,
water
Use synonyms
 heating
resulted
Add the preposition
resulted in
resulted from
show examples
 most of the
green house
Correct your spelling
greenhouse
show examples
gas
Use synonyms
 emissions which
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 32%,
substantly
Correct your spelling
substantially
 other appliances and refrigeration ranked in with 28% and 14%. Just like the rankings of the first
chart
Use synonyms
, but only heating changes into refrigeration. After 3 most
gas
Use synonyms
emmited
Correct your spelling
emitted
 units, heating with 15%, lightning with 8% and cooling with 3%.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, gas, chart, water with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 6 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Average Australian household
  • Greenhouse gas emissions
  • Energy consumption
  • Activities
  • Heating
  • Cooling
  • Water heating
  • Appliances
  • Lighting
  • Standby
  • Percentage (%)
  • Consumption patterns
  • Efficiency
  • Emissions impact
  • Renewable energy
  • Energy-saving measures
  • Sustainability
  • Carbon footprint
  • Electricity
  • Natural gas
  • Emissions breakdown
  • Energy audit
  • Environmental impact
  • Conservation
  • Mitigation strategies
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