The best way to improve health is to exercise daily. To what extend do you agree?
Fitness and
well being
are directly related to each other. Many people believe that exercising is the main way to be healthy, Add a hyphen
well-being
while
many others argue that sleeping properly and a balanced diet are required. Then
, I staunchly believe that not only practicing
physical activities but Change the spelling
practising
also
quality
of intaken Add an article
the quality
are
vital.
To start with, it is well-known that daily exercise Change the verb form
is
have
many benefits, namely decreasing cardiovascular risk, improvement of chronic diseases like primary hypertension and diabetes, etc. Change the verb form
has
According to
the evidence given by the WHO, 150 minutes of effective exercise weekly are required, in which maximal heart rate have
to be reached during the practices in order to increase metabolic rate and total energy expenditure. Correct subject-verb agreement
has
Then
, the above-mentioned techniques have been proved
as either prevention or treatment of many Correct your spelling
proven
illness
, including metabolic, mental and musculoskeletal conditions.
Change to a plural noun
illnesses
Nevertheless
, there are other factors that are crucial to enhance health promotion as well as
disease prevention, one of the foremost is food. Undoubtedly, a
high-quality daily consumption has shown Correct article usage
apply
dramatical
enhancements Replace the word
dramatic
among
life expectancy with Change preposition
in
reduction
of complications Correct article usage
a reduction
such
as renal chronic and stroke diseases. For example
, in a documental called "You are what you eat", in which many variables were studied in twins to avoid genetically expressions that could lead to bias in the results, were proving
that a well-rounded eating plan with vitamins, macronutrients, and minerals revitalize our bodies.
Wrong verb form
proved
To sum up
, wellness is a recipe in which many ingredients should be considered, and although
excersing
is one of the elements Correct your spelling
exercise
that is
location
at the acme, ingestion of proper food in amount, quality and range of nutrients Replace the word
located
are
crucial to guarantee Correct subject-verb agreement
is
quality
of life.Add an article
the quality
Submitted by luciaagudelomotta on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Ensure every paragraph has a clear main idea and supporting details. This helps strengthen your argument and makes your essay more persuasive.
coherence and cohesion
Use a variety of linking words to connect ideas within and between paragraphs; this enhances the flow of your essay.
general
Proofread your essay to correct minor grammatical errors and typos; this will improve the overall readability.
task achievement
You've effectively used examples and evidence to support your points, which strengthens your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion were clear and effective, setting up your argument and summarizing your position well.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.