The map below shows a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today.

#park #first

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The provided maps show a public

park

Use synonyms

in 1920 and how it’s been redesigned today.

Overall

Linking Words

while

Linking Words

the location of

few

Correct article usage

a few

show examples

of the places

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

remained the same, newer places have

also

Linking Words

been built and added to the scheme. It is noticeable from the design in 1920 that the fountain in the central area has been replaced by the rose garden surrounded by seats. The water feature has taken the place of the glasshouse in the right corner below; leaving no place for the earlier seats.

Although

Linking Words

there was a stage for musicians at the left of the

park

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about a century ago, it has been replaced by an amphitheatre for concerts which people can enjoy.

In addition

Linking Words

to the upper and lower entrances, an entrance for the underground car

park

Use synonyms

is placed near the water feature. The top left rose garden hasn’t changed,

whereas

Linking Words

the other one has been removed and replaced by a cafe.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, it appears that having a children’s play area was more appealing to those who changed the

park

Use synonyms

as opposed to a water-plant pond.

Submitted by viana.elahi on Fri Apr 12 2024

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Contractions: Don't use contractions.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words park with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: The word "changed" was used 2 times.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

180 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

landscaping changes
urbanization
ecological footprint
sustainability measures
recreational amenities
infrastructural enhancements
historical evolution
technological integration
public sentiment
conservation efforts

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The map below shows a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today.

In the future, it seems more difficult to live on Earth. Some people think more money should be spent researching other planets, such as Mars. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Number of people who are at high risk due to overweight.what is the reason?

Nowadays, many people prefer to seek medical advice on the Internet instead of seeing a qualified doctor. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or a negative development?

In some areas of the USA, a ‘curfew’ is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be out of doors after a particular time at night unless they are accompanied by an adult. What is your opinion aboout this?

Some people think governments should spend as much money as possible exploring outer space. Others argue they should spend the money for poor people. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.