PEOPLE NOWADAYS ARE NOT FIT AND ACTIVE THAN THE PEOPLE FROM THE OLDEN DAYS. DISCUSS THE CAUSES FOR THIS SITUATION AND SUGGEST SOME POSSIBLE SITUATIONS.

#people #situation #situations

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It is a widely

accepeted

Correct your spelling

accepted

fact that, that previous generations were more healthy and

in-shape

Correct your spelling

in shape

show examples

comparision

Correct your spelling

comparison

to the recent one.The

invention

of modern appliances and consumption of convenience

fastfood

Correct your spelling

fast food

are the major causes of

this

problem and turning to the fitness

regims

Correct your spelling

regimens

and utilization of less processed meals are the possible solutions. First of all,

due to

the

invention

of high-tech machinery, the workload of an individual is

minimze

Correct your spelling

minimal

and now the basic tasks which

required

Wrong verb form

require

show examples

a lot of toil are now performed in seconds.

This

on one end

providing

Wrong verb form

provides

show examples

ease to an individual and on another hand it

also

turns him into an indolent one.

For instance

due to

invention

Correct article usage

the invention

show examples

of cargo elevators and lifts installed in buildings, not only efforts are minimized, but

Correct pronoun usage

they

show examples

also

reduces

Correct subject-verb agreement

reduce

show examples

the turmoil. The possible solution

Change preposition

show examples

this

is to avoid elevators for minor work and keep yourself active through involvement in sports and physical fitness programs.

Secondly

Due to

invention

Correct article usage

the invention

show examples

of fried food items like zinger burgers ,steaks and crispy

broasts

Correct your spelling

breasts

roasts

boasts

, these items, when consumed on

daily

Correct article usage

a daily

show examples

basis, not only

increased

Wrong verb form

increase

show examples

the weight of a person

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

prone them to diseases like

artherosclerosis

Correct your spelling

atherosclerosis

diabetes and hypertension, which not only affects the health but

also

damages the body.

For

example

Add a comma

example,

show examples

diabeteic

Correct your spelling

diabetic

foot is an adverse effect caused by spiked levels of glucose in

blood

Add an article

the blood

show examples

.The possible solution to

this

problem is to avoid

junkfood

Correct your spelling

junk food

and to

adapt

Correct your spelling

adopt

show examples

Correct article usage

a health

show examples

health

Replace the word

healthy

show examples

lifestyle with

consumption

Correct article usage

the consumption

show examples

of green leafy

vegetable

Fix the agreement mistake

vegetables

show examples

and fruits .

To conclude

, as

this

generation

adapted

Correct your spelling

adopted

show examples

sedentry

Correct your spelling

sedentary

lifestyle and to make matters more serious the utilization of

Correct article usage

an oil

show examples

oil rich

Add a hyphen

oil-rich

show examples

diet creates

Remove the article

apply

show examples

havoc in an individual life.

However

Add a comma

However,

show examples

an active lifestyle and

Change the article

show examples

adaptation to a

balance

Change the verb form

balanced

show examples

diet is a possible solution to

this

burning problem.

Submitted by mahambaqai on Fri Apr 12 2024

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Language Precision

Be careful with spelling and punctuation. Minor errors, such as 'accepeted' instead of 'accepted', can distract from the clarity of your message. Consider using tools to check spelling before finalizing your essay.

Sentence Variety

Work on the variety of sentence structures. Using a mix of complex and simple sentences can enhance the readability and sophistication of your essay.

Coherence & Cohesion

Use transitions more effectively between sentences and paragraphs. This can help in making your essay more coherent and fluent, guiding the reader through your arguments smoothly.

Task Response

Provide more specific examples to support your points. Real-life examples or statistics can significantly strengthen your arguments and make them more convincing.

Effective Conclusion

Ensure your conclusion summarizes the essay effectively. Restating the main points and your stance clearly in the conclusion will make your argument more memorable and impactful.

Task Achievement

You addressed both parts of the task: discussing the causes and suggesting solutions, which demonstrates a good understanding of the task requirements.

Structural Organization

The essay is organized in paragraphs, each focusing on a particular aspect of the topic, which aids in the essay's overall structure and clarity.

Engagement with Topic

You engaged with the topic well, showing an awareness of the factors contributing to current health trends and suggesting practical solutions.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
35
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

293 words

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PEOPLE NOWADAYS ARE NOT FIT AND ACTIVE THAN THE PEOPLE FROM THE OLDEN DAYS. DISCUSS THE CAUSES FOR THIS SITUATION AND SUGGEST SOME POSSIBLE SITUATIONS.

For some people learning in a group is the most effective way. While others prefer one-on-one instruction. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

Some people think that students benefit greatly from going to private secondary schools, but others assert that private secondary schools have a negative impact on the young generation and the society alike. Discuss both views.

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might be this is the case? Do you think this is a psitive or negative situation?

Some people say that individuals do no protect cannot make difference, others say that individuals can protect environment. Discuss both views and give your opinion.