IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

A university degree is essential for people who want to have a successful career. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#university #people #career
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It is certainly true that more and more emphasis is placed on the acquisition of academic qualifications, and the growing number of people preparing for higher
education
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. A matter of debate is the subject of whether or not a
university
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 qualification ensures a successful
career
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.
This
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 essay deals with some of the opinions for and against
this
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 matter. One convincing point against
this
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 attitude is the 'missed opportunities' of
university
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-educated people.
This
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 is to say, having a
university
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 degree can be very demanding. It may take four years or even more to obtain a degree
while
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this
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 time could be used more effectively with more practical
skills
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. Another reason against
this
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 attitude is that higher
education
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 does not necessarily lead to promotions and successful careers.
In other words
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,
education
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 is not always the best route for climbing the
career
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 ladder or having a successful business.
Therefore
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, it could be argued that higher
education
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 does not automatically qualify an individual for a bright
career
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 life, and practically a large number of factors contribute to
career
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 success. The most important argument in favour of
this
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 subject is that having academic qualifications enables people to have more
career
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-growth opportunities. It is notable that an important criterion in most promotion standards is having an academic qualification.
This
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 means
university
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 graduates are more likely to have high-ranking positions resulting in higher salaries and more financial benefits. Another reason to be taken into consideration is that most
university
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 courses are primarily designed to enhance students' practical and theoretical
skills
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.
Such
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 courses are intended to boost the learners' practical abilities
such
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 as organisational and teamwork
skills
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 which in turn lead to more job opportunities for having a decent job.
While
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 it may be true to say that
university
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education
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 does not always ensure a prosperous
career
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, in my opinion, it is almost always considered a very important factor. I think the best way to achieve a successful
career
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 is to increase theoretical knowledge and job-related
skills
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 which certainly require a comprehensive plan.
Submitted by TUTOO on

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specific examples
For further improvement, try incorporating more specific examples to support your arguments. While your essay discusses general advantages and disadvantages of university education, incorporating detailed examples can help illustrate your points more vividly.
nuanced argument
Consider also exploring the nuances of your argument more deeply. Acknowledge that while a university degree can open doors, success in a career also depends on personal effort, networking, continuous learning, and adapting to changes within industries.
structure
You've done well in structuring your essay clearly, making good use of paragraphs to separate your ideas.
introduction and conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion are well-crafted, clearly stating your thesis and summarizing your main points effectively.
balanced discussion
You've presented a balanced view by discussing both sides of the argument, which helps in creating a well-rounded discussion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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