In search of jobs, many countryside residents are moving to urban areas for better job opportunities. This essay will discuss the main consequences of migrating to city ares and propose some solutions to this problem.
The main consequences caused by farmers relocating to different city spaces are a decrease in
aglicultural
products and an increased risk of overpopulation. Farmers are the backbone of a country because they provide food to people. Less production leads to Correct your spelling
agricultural
scarity
of food and it is hurting the country’s economy. Correct your spelling
scarcity
security
Additionaly
, dependency on other countries Correct your spelling
Additionally
also
increases. Morever
, as city areas are already crowded by large numbers of people when humanity Correct your spelling
Moreover
move
Change the verb form
moves
these
places it becomes overpopulated and Change preposition
to these
unmanged
. Air Correct your spelling
unmanaged
pollutuion
, noise pollution, and finding suitable jobs are the major rising Correct your spelling
pollution
challenge
in downtown areas.
The best solution to these results is building schools, colleges, and hospitals in the countryside. Fix the agreement mistake
challenges
Firstly
, most parents want their children to be educated, healthier and have a bright future. When colleges and hospitals are built in such
fields, obviously. the number of people moving to city fields will eventually decrease. Moreover
, ranchers should be provided subsidies and other facilities. If credits are provided by the government to producers, then
they can enhance their performance and productivity.
In conclusion, the trend of communities moving to downtown operations in search of career openings results in many consequences, including scarcity of crops and an unmanaged population. The most effective solution is to furnish health, higher education and most importantly, granting subsidies to local families by the authorities.Submitted by vardanyaninna10 on
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task achievement
Try to further elaborate your examples to provide a stronger impact on your argumentation. This can give your essay more depth and enhance its persuasive power.
coherence cohesion
Ensure you proofread your essay to correct typos and grammatical inaccuracies such as 'scarity' instead of 'scarcity', 'Morever' instead of 'Moreover', and 'aglicultural' instead of 'agricultural'.
coherence cohesion
You could improve the coherence by making smoother transitions between paragraphs and within paragraphs to better connect your ideas.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear structure that effectively introduces, discusses, and concludes on the topic.
task achievement
You successfully address the task by discussing the consequences of rural to urban migration and proposing solutions.
task achievement
Your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the subject matter, presenting relevant issues and solutions.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.