IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

İn the future nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying.

#i̇n #future #nobody #newspapers #books
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Nowadays technology has become an integral part of our lives. It is argued that in the future
people
Use synonyms
 will opt for reading online
books
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
 of printed newspapers and
books
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. I agree that
due to
Linking Words
 technological advancements online reading materials will be more ubiquitous. The first reason why I think online
books
Use synonyms
 will be more common is their portability. In today’s demanding world
people
Use synonyms
 have to go to work in order to meet their needs.
Hence
Linking Words
, it will be hard to carry
books
Use synonyms
 with them
while
Linking Words
 commuting.
However
Linking Words
, online
books
Use synonyms
 are accessible everywhere, making reading much easier.
Secondly
Linking Words
, sometimes
people
Use synonyms
 have to pay a lot of
money
Use synonyms
 to buy
books
Use synonyms
. In
this
Linking Words
 situation online
books
Use synonyms
 generate an opportunity for readers to access a great variety of
books
Use synonyms
 without paying
money
Use synonyms
, so
people
Use synonyms
 can spend
this
Linking Words
money
Use synonyms
 on their other needs.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in order to print
books
Use synonyms
 a multitude of trees is cut. Excessive logging of the trees can have dire consequences on nature, affecting ecosystem balance and eventually
leads
Wrong verb form
leading
show examples
 to the loss of biodiversity.
In addition
Linking Words
, governments should spend a lot of
money
Use synonyms
 to meet the publishing expenses. They can spend the funds allocated for the publishing process on other purposes
such
Linking Words
 as improving infrastructure and providing diverse educational and medical facilities. Taking everything into account, I think
people
Use synonyms
 will choose online reading materials over
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
traditional printed
books
Use synonyms
 for several reasons. Accessibility of online resources will appeal to
people
Use synonyms
, create an opportunity for
people
Use synonyms
 to read anywhere they want and prevent the loss of forests and biodiversity.
Submitted by Name_1234 on

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Language Use
Try to offer more varied sentence structures and vocabulary to enhance the richness of your text.
Task Achievement
Consider adding more specific examples or data to support your arguments. This could include statistics, studies or notable real-world examples.
Coherence and Cohesion
To further improve coherence, transition words or phrases could be used more effectively to guide the reader through your points.
Task Achievement
Your essay presents a clear position throughout, effectively addressing the prompt.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have effectively structured your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, which aids readability.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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