Some people think that advertising may have positive economic effects. Others think it has negative social effects because advertising makes individuals less satisfied with what they are and have. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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It is argued that advertising
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
some positive economic effect
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
our society
on the other hand
Linking Words
, there are many folks who
are not agree
Change the verb form
do not agree
show examples
with
Use synonyms
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
. There I will discuss both views and I will
say
Verb problem
give
show examples
my opinion. Of course, there are some positive economic effects
by
Change preposition
of
show examples
promotion
as well
Linking Words
as
Correct word choice
and
show examples
I have heard many
of
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apply
show examples
manufacture’s
Change noun form
manufacturers’
show examples
productivities are sold just by
advertisement
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
,
reporter
Correct article usage
a reporter
show examples
declared on television news
which
Correct word choice
that
show examples
50 % of our products are introduced by publicity. another point is that
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
can know more and more
most
Change preposition
about most
show examples
generations and they
could
Wrong verb form
can
show examples
trust to buy them.
therefore
Linking Words
, our
economic
Replace the word
economy
show examples
will be developed
by
Change preposition
in
show examples
such
Linking Words
Correct article usage
a manners
show examples
manners
Fix the agreement mistake
manner
show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words
, if authorities had not advertised about buying
a
Change the article
an
show examples
affordable house, some
people
Use synonyms
would not have a house so, advertising can be useful for
people
Use synonyms
and our
economic
Replace the word
economy
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, there are some negative
impact
Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
show examples
on our society by
advertisement
Use synonyms
. should be mentioned that some poor
manufactures
Correct your spelling
manufacturers
show examples
are advertised and are sold by promotion. It is fair to say some individuals are unsatisfied
from
Change preposition
in
show examples
this
Linking Words
manner because they
relied
Wrong verb form
rely
show examples
heavily on their media and they buy
such
Linking Words
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
products
for example
Linking Words
, a production expert informed on television that many
people
Use synonyms
buy their
purchase
Fix the agreement mistake
purchases
show examples
just by
comply
Wrong verb form
complying
show examples
of
Change preposition
with
show examples
Use synonyms
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
which
exist
Change the verb form
exists
show examples
on their social media at the same time if products are made very poor,
people
Use synonyms
will not buy their purchase in the next time. I strongly believe that advertising must be controlled by authorities because
this
Linking Words
manner is very practical
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
people
Use synonyms
and our country In conclusion, I can say advertising on social media is
very
Add an article
a very
show examples
important way to promote our
economic
Replace the word
economy
show examples
it has
out weight
Correct your spelling
outweighing
show examples
advantages
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
its drawbacks.
Submitted by mrhoshangi87 on

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structure
Make sure your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on one main idea. It's great to see you have an introduction and a conclusion, but try to make your body paragraphs more focused on single ideas.
sentence structure
Use varied sentence structures to make your essay more engaging. Mixing complex sentences with simple ones can make your arguments clearer and more compelling.
examples
Support your arguments with specific examples. While you mentioned examples like the effect of advertising on product sales and housing, try to include more detailed examples to strengthen your points.
word choice
Avoid repetition of words and phrases. Try to find synonyms or rephrase your sentences to improve the readability of your essay.
opinion clarity
Ensure your opinion is clearly stated and supported. It's great that you've provided your viewpoint, but make sure it is consistently clear throughout the essay.
use of examples
Good use of an example to support your argument about economic development through advertising.
introduction & conclusion
You successfully introduced the topic and provided a conclusion that summarizes your viewpoint.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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