Some people should focus on everything, whereas other people think that they should focus on only those that they find interesting. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
this
Linking Words
present world, the usage of
technology
Use synonyms
is constantly on the rise. Even classrooms are among the many places that enjoy the usage and benefits of
technology
Use synonyms
. It is disagreed that
classroom
Use synonyms
teachers
Use synonyms
will be totally substituted for
technology
Use synonyms
. Analysing the incapability of disciplining
classroom
Use synonyms
students
Use synonyms
with
technology
Use synonyms
,
as well as
Linking Words
the limitation in the learning process of
students
Use synonyms
taught with
technology
Use synonyms
will prove
this
Linking Words
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, a robotic teacher made with artificial intelligence would lack sufficient control over its
classroom
Use synonyms
students
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, it is widely known that kids need to be thoroughly watched by their
teachers
Use synonyms
to be sure that they take their classwork seriously and do not fool around when classes are going on. Sadly,
this
Linking Words
is a task robotic
teachers
Use synonyms
will be incapable of carrying out.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
makes it clear that
classroom
Use synonyms
teachers
Use synonyms
will never be totally substituted for
technology
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the learning process of
students
Use synonyms
would be disrupted if they
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
taught by robotic
teachers
Use synonyms
, which may slow down some
students
Use synonyms
’ ability to comprehend information taught in lessons.
For example
Linking Words
, kids love to be motivated before lessons are taught effectively.
This
Linking Words
is a quality that many human
teachers
Use synonyms
have but robotic
teachers
Use synonyms
do not have.
Thus
Linking Words
it becomes apparent that human
teachers
Use synonyms
will never be replaced with robotic
teachers
Use synonyms
in a
classroom
Use synonyms
. To summarise, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to
students
Use synonyms
and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
the idea of running a
classroom
Use synonyms
completely by a machine cannot be supported. After
thorough
Correct article usage
a thorough
show examples
analysis
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
Linking Words
subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over
technology
Use synonyms
-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of
this
Linking Words
,
classroom
Use synonyms
teachers
Use synonyms
will never be substituted for
technology
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by Abalomamat on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Be sure to directly address the essay question in your introduction to clearly set the context for your discussion. While your essay focuses on the role of technology in classrooms, it misses directly addressing the specific debate on focusing on broad vs. specialized interests.
coherence cohesion
Try to enrich your essay with a wider range of linking words and phrases to enhance cohesion and create smoother transitions between ideas.
task achievement
While providing examples, ensure they are detailed and directly support the point being made. This strengthens the argument and helps in making your essay more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clear, effectively bookending your discussion. This strengthens the structure of your essay.
coherence cohesion
You've presented a well-structured argument that progresses logically through your points, making your essay easy to follow.
task achievement
The use of examples to support your points, despite needing more details, helps in illustrating your arguments and makes them more concrete.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • holistic development
  • cognitive development
  • well-rounded education
  • adaptive
  • interdisciplinary skills
  • lifelong learning
  • personalized learning
  • deep expertise
  • broad knowledge base
  • career flexibility
  • problem solvers
  • self-directed learning
  • essential subjects
  • critical life skills
  • informed citizenship
  • motivation
  • engagement
  • neglect
  • interests
  • personal growth
What to do next:
Look at other essays: