many people today find they have insufficient time to spend with their families,because of pressure of work.what problems does this creat for individuals and their families?what solutions can you propose?which would be the most effective solution,inyour view?

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this

Linking Words

contemporary era, most

people

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follow a sedentary

lifestyle

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due to

Linking Words

work

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pressure

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from their organisations.

This

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creates a stressful atmosphere for them and their families. It is a concern that needs to be addressed,

reasons

Correct word choice

and reasons

show examples

and solutions in

this

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situation are discussed in the ensuing paragraphs. First and foremost, there are some problems stemming from a lack of balance between

work

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schedule and personal life.

People

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have the tendency to bring their office stress to their home, which jeopardizes their family life.

This

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unbalanced

lifestyle

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results in health issues like obesity, diabetes, high cholesterol, and high blood

pressure

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.To exemplify, my brother who is a software engineer, does not have a fixed regime or programme to detoxify from his

work

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pressure

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This

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strenuous

lifestyle

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affected him mentally

as well as

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physically.

Secondly

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, individuals get addicted to convenience food because they don't have enough time to prepare a healthy meal.

This

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addiction to fast food impacted their health negatively. To illustrate, there was a spike in the proportion of

people

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who suffer from deadly diseases like cancer

due to

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unhealthy eating habits. There are many solutions to these problems,

such

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people

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can motivate themselves and create a plan for an active

lifestyle

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Moreover

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, organisations like

MNC's

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MNCs

show examples

can raise awareness among their

employees

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regarding the health impacts

due to

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poor diet.

For example

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, many

MNC's

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MNCs

show examples

like Larsen and Toubro provide gym facilities and meal packages for their

employees

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This

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support system

effects

Replace the word

affects

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the

employees

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overall

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well being

Add a hyphen

well-being

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Additionally

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counseling

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counselling

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services can be provided by organisations to reduce the stress level of

employees

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Finally

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, companies can fix

work

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routines for their staff,

hence

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, they can

spent

Change the verb form

spend

show examples

enough time with their

Correct word choice

loved

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ones. In conclusion,

work

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pressure

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creates

lot

Change the article

a lot

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of negative impacts in one's life.

However

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, employers and

employees

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can set rules, proper

work

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regime

Fix the agreement mistake

regimes

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and effective measures to tackle these problems.

crpnivedya.prasannanSat Apr 13 2024

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structural

Ensure a clear distinction between paragraphs and ideas to enhance readability. Start a new paragraph for each new main idea.

cohesive devices

Include a wider range of linking phrases to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs.

conclusion depth

Consider adding a more detailed conclusion that not only summarizes the main points but also reflects on the implications or suggests a more finalized opinion.

examples

You effectively used real-world examples to support your points, making your arguments more persuasive.

relevance

Your essay demonstrates a strong command of the subject, addressing both problems and solutions with clear relevance to the topic.

structure

The organizational structure of your essay, with a distinct introduction, body, and conclusion, supports clarity and understanding.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

308 words

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many people today find they have insufficient time to spend with their families,because of pressure of work.what problems does this creat for individuals and their families?what solutions can you propose?which would be the most effective solution,inyour view?

Many businesses think that the new employees who have just graduated from schools lack interpersonal skills, such as working with colleagues as a team. What has caused this and what are the solutions to this problem?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Differences between countries are becoming less evident. Nowadays people are watching the same films, fashion, brands, advertisements and TV channels. To what extent do the disadvantages of this outweigh the advantages?

Some people think climate change has a negative impact on business, while others think that it provides more business option. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.