In many cities, crime is increasing. Why do you think this is happening? what can government do to help reduce crime levels?

#cities #crime #government #levels

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It is true that

crime

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is increasing in many cities these days. In my opinion, there are three reasons why

crime

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is increasing

such

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as poverty and

unimployment

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unemployment

, drug

addtion

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addiction

addition

, and new technology developments.

Firstly

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the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

poverty and unemployment encourage

people

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to commit

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

Use synonyms

crime

Fix the agreement mistake

crimes

show examples

to make

living

Correct article usage

a living

show examples

This

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has been

main

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the main

show examples

reason for a long time in society. It is a basic concern for

people

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how to live, so

this

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can make

people

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Change the verb form

apply

show examples

commit a

crime

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for

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show examples

serviving

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survive

Secondly

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, drug addicts tend to engage in criminal activities. These days,

this

Linking Words

is a serious social issue increasing drug

criminals

Replace the word

crimes

show examples

. Especially

this

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makes

people

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Change the verb form

apply

show examples

distribute drugs

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show examples

social

Replace the word

society

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so even

youth

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young

show examples

people

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are

Unnecessary verb

apply

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participate in

this

Linking Words

kind of

crime

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Lastly

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, the advantage of new technology results in new types of

crime

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According to

Linking Words

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

research in Korea, new types of

crime

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such

Linking Words

as voice pishing and even

oneline

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online

pishing

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

show examples

increased sharply and there are so many victims everywhere. To prevent crimes,

government

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the government

show examples

should use a strong punishment and sometimes

death

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the death

show examples

panelty

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penalty

is essential.

This

Linking Words

can reduce the possibility of criminal reoffending and eliminate the possibility

ofo

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future victims.

For instance

Linking Words

Singapore

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in Singapore

show examples

, which has capital

punishiments

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punishment

punishments

, the

crime

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rate is relatively lower than any other

countries

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country

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. In conclusion,

government

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the government

show examples

should carry out

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apply

show examples

the

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apply

show examples

capital punishment to prevent heinous crimes to protect citizens from offenders.

Submitted by hmhy0326 on Sun Apr 14 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement

Ensure all main ideas are fully developed with explanations and examples. Some points, such as the impact of technology on crime, could be expanded.

Coherence & Cohesion

Include a wider range of cohesive devices and transition phrases to enhance the flow between ideas.

Task Achievement

Review and adhere to different perspectives on controversial topics, like capital punishment, ensuring a balanced view is presented.

Coherence & Cohesion

Your essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing your argument.

Task Achievement

Good job identifying key reasons for the increase in crime, making your essay relevant and informative.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

6 paragraphs

225 words

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In many cities, crime is increasing. Why do you think this is happening? what can government do to help reduce crime levels?

Fully explain your ideas

An increasing number of professionals such as doctor and teacher are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problem does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situation?

some people believe that experiments with animals should be outlawed, while others are convinced that it is the best way to achieve some sientific goals. how do you thing is there is any possible alternitive and should experimentations be outlawed?

You have bought some clothing online and are not satisfied with your purchase. Write a letter to the company that you bought the clothing from. In your email -Give detail of the purchase -Desribe the problem -Explain why you need a replacement urgently.

In some countries, children under 16 years old are not allowed to leave school by law and get full-time work . Is this a good or bad thing ? Discuss your opinion.