Today, more children are spending their time in font of TV compared to the past. Why do you think this happens? is this a positive or negative change?

#children #time #font #tv #change

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Nowadays, more and more parents are allowing their

children

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to spend too much

time

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in front of Television. I see

this

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as a result

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of adults' lack of awareness of the negative impact of too much screen

time

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on young

kids

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including their health and social development.

Therefore

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, the increasing number of underage people watching

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has been down-grade progress in our society. Ideally, parents, teachers, and other responsible adults should know the importance of suitable stimulus for

kids

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. Unfortunately, many fail to understand that there are some media -in

this

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case television- that bring more harm than benefits to

kids

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especially if it is being given too much. Even worse if no adult is around to guide them

while

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watching. We never know if the show presented is appropriate to their age. As a matter of fact, numerous studies have found that the habit of regularly watching

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for

children

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aged under 13 has caused health problems

such

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as low vision and a sedentary lifestyle.

Furthermore

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this

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harmful behaviour has

also

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influenced how

kids

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interact with their friends. It is known that

kids

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who watch

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more than the maximum screen

time

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recommended by experts are facing social problems

such

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as insecurity and trouble approaching their friends.

To conclude

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, the uprising case of little

kids

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spending unlimited

time

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in front of the

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is caused by parents' little knowledge of the importance of

children

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's screen-

time

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limitation. Personally, I strongly believe that

this

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behavioural change in

kids

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brings more harm than good.

For instance

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, it has caused

children

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's health and social problems.

Therefore

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, adults should be more thoughtful of their

kids

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' watch

time

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and find alternative media that are more beneficial to young

kids

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e.g. drawing books, encyclopedias, interactive board games, etc.

Submitted by lidyaprmata on Sun Jul 07 2024

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task achievement

To enhance the task response, consider exploring the reasons why parents allow children to spend more time in front of the TV in more depth. Also, try to incorporate more specific examples or case studies that illustrate your points.

coherence cohesion

For coherence and cohesion, it helps to use a wider variety of linking words and phrases to ensure fluid transitions between ideas. Additionally, ensure each paragraph clearly flows into the next.

introduction conclusion present

The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion that succinctly summarize the main points.

supported main points

The essay effectively supports main points with relevant explanations and facts.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

292 words

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Today, more children are spending their time in font of TV compared to the past. Why do you think this happens? is this a positive or negative change?

In major cities around the world, traffic congestion has become a serious problem. How can this problem be tackled? Give reasons and examples from your own experience.

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

Some people think that competition at work, at schooland in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to coctate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Some people believe that increasing tax on various industries will reduce pollution whereas others believe that there are better alternatives. Discuss both the view and give your opinion.

.In many countries, the number of people suffering from stress is increasing. What do you think are the causes of this problem and what measures could be taken to tackle it? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.