IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main feature and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main feature and make comparisons where relevant.
#proportion #population #three #countries #summarise #information #feature #comparisons
The provided table gives data and previsions about differences in
percentage
Add an article
the percentage
show examples
 of people aged over 65. The analysis is taken on three different nations, that are Canada, Germany and the UK. Data are split
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
 three specific years: 1988, 2000 and 2030.
Overall
, we can see that the country with more
habitants
Correct your spelling
inhabitants
show examples
 with an age over 65 is Germany, for every year taken
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
 consideration. Following, we can find Canada, that faces a significant increase throughout the years.
As
Change preposition
Third
show examples
third,
we find the UK,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
also
 presents an enormous percentage increase for the predicted year.
Therefore
, none of these three countries, experience a decline
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 people aged 65 or more. More detailed, it can be noticed that Germany experiences a constant growth in number of population aged over 65, growing about 5% in each year analysed.
Moreover
, the UK saw a
little
Correct word choice
small
show examples
 rise between 1988 and 2000, compared to Canada
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 saw
his
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
 over
65’
Change noun form
65
show examples
 population
increasing
Wrong verb form
increase
show examples
 by around 4%.
Submitted by silvestriandrea.it on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: