Some people believe that technological advancements have made our lives simpler and more convenient while others argue that these developments have led to a loss of important life skills. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Nowadays the significance of technological which has become more controversial with many
people
claiming that it is beneficial
while
others reject
this
notion. In my opinion, the former proposition appears to be more well-considered.
This
essay will
further
collaborate my views for
favoring
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favouring
show examples
the positive impact of
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
trends and
thus
will lead to a
logically
Change the adverb
logical
show examples
conclusion. Analyzing the statement and explaining
further
, the first and foremost reason behind is that it connects
people
all over the world.
People
can communicate with each other
easier
Rephrase
more easily
show examples
than more before.
Furthermore
, the internet enables
people
to get access to online
class
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classes
show examples
independent of their locations, which is very useful for teenagers. What is more, individuals could spend more time on their private work
as well as
their families.
On the contrary
, those in
favor
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favour
show examples
of the latter
oppinion
Correct your spelling
opinion
have their own arguments.
To begin
with
Add a comma
with,
show examples
they claim that it is associated with a sedentary.
In addition
to be more specific in the present time. Young
people
prefer to spend more time on technology
equipments
Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
show examples
than
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
do outdoor activities.
As a result
, children might face eye problems.
Additionally
, artificial intelligence
have
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has
show examples
huge
Correct article usage
a huge
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the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
role
of
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for
show examples
humans in life. In consequence, many workers become unemployed and as far as
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
is concerned,
they
Correct pronoun usage
this
show examples
might happen
several
Change preposition
in several
show examples
matters. In conclusion, to the above statement, neither its pros nor cons can be neglected.
Submitted by nazirovmuhammad71 on

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Introduction Clarity
Ensure your introduction clearly outlines the topic and your stance, providing a clear preview of what is to come in the essay. This will make your argument more coherent from the beginning.
Paragraph Structure
Aim for clear, distinct paragraphs that each address a singular point. Start each paragraph with a topic sentence that introduces the point, followed by examples or explanations.
Use of Examples
Provide specific examples to support your arguments. These examples should be relevant and help illustrate your point more vividly.
Essay Structure
Pay attention to your essay structure. A well-structured essay typically includes an introduction, body paragraphs each dedicated to a specific point, and a conclusion that sums up the essay's main points and restates your position.
Language Accuracy
Work on the accuracy of your language use, including grammar, vocabulary, and punctuation. Small inaccuracies can distract from your argument.
Introduction
You've included an introductory statement that attempts to address the topic and outline your position.
Discussion of Both Views
You've attempted to discuss both views, which is crucial for fully addressing the essay prompt.
Conclusion
The conclusion attempts to summarize the essay's main points, though it could be clearer and more direct.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • technological advancements
  • simplifies
  • convenient
  • communication
  • healthcare
  • reliance
  • degradation
  • fundamental skills
  • navigation
  • manual calculation
  • social interactions
  • digital mediation
  • overly dependent
  • critical thinking
  • interpersonal skills
  • preserve
  • cultivate
  • complements
  • educational systems
  • social structures
  • technological fluency
  • life skills
  • mitigate
  • potential downsides
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