Air travel is responsible for a lot of pollution in our environment. Some people think that prices of airplane tickets should be increased in order to reduce air traffic. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays there is a lot of
air
pollution caused by increased
air
traffic
.
Nevertheless
, a group of
people
think that tickets on aeroplane flyes should be cost more for declining
air
traffic
numbers. I absolutely disagree with
this
statement.
Firstly
, if
air
traffic
costs are increased, fewer
people
going to be able to travel around the world.
For example
, not very rich families who are used to travelling each summer to different
countries
, will be forced to do it more rarely.
However
, if most
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
will stop their journey around the world, the economics of some of the
countries
will dramatically fall.
Moreover
, for those
people
who need to be mobile and fast in any situation, going to decrease their movement speed.
For instance
, presidents, CEO's and different sportsmen who have a tight
traffic
.
Furthermore
, if
frequency
Add an article
the frequency
show examples
of
air
flyes
Correct your spelling
flies
show examples
is significantly reduced, a lot of
people
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
used to work in the
air
team
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
will lose their jobs which lead to unemployment and
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
worse life quality in certain
countries
.
Secondly
, if tickets are more expensive, the number, cost, frequency and speed of parcels going to be much more compared with the default
air
traffic
amount.
Additionally
,
due to
the fewer
air
trips, related to each other
people
go to see each other much less often than they used to do.
Thus
,
people
's relationship quality will be spoiled.
To sum up
,
airplane
Correct article usage
an airplane
show examples
ticket price increase is very bad because of the numerous causes, it is going to reduce tourism,
mails
Fix the agreement mistake
mail
show examples
and
parcels
Fix the agreement mistake
parcel
show examples
efficiency, face-by-face conversations,
movement
Correct word choice
and movement
show examples
speed and destroy economics in some
countries
.
Submitted by berlinastanalll on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
Work on refining your introduction and conclusion to make them more impactful and aligned with the body of your essay.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly states your disagreement with the given statement, which sets a clear direction for your essay.
coherence cohesion
You have effectively included a conclusion that summarizes your key points and reinforces your overall position.

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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