Some people say that protecting the environment is the government’s responsibility. Others believe that every individual's responsibility for it. Discuss both views and give your opinion. People seem to have contradictory views regarding whether preserving the environment is limited to responsibility of the administration.
I believe that the former point of
vie
is more convincing and applicable in most contexts. Some people advocate that Correct your spelling
view
reduce
pollution is Wrong verb form
reducing
obligation
of the state. The first benefit is that it is a commendable Add an article
the obligation
an obligation
behavior
that can generate positive outcomes for individuals and society. Change the spelling
behaviour
This
behavior
manifests social responsibility and Change the spelling
behaviour
humanitarian
spirit. It can contribute to the resolution of social problems and Correct article usage
a humanitarian
to
improve waste pollution and public promotion. At the same time, the ministration holds more authority methods to help people how to care Fix the infinitive
apply
of
natural resources.
Other people support the idea that it is everyone’s obligation. It exposes us to different opinions and knowledge, which Change preposition
for
situmlates
us to be more active and healthier. We may Correct your spelling
stimulates
also
be motivated to challenge existing limits of norms and values, and even generate breakthrough ideas about waste utilization and how to reduce personal waste. Meanwhile, this
can set a good example for our generation, because children learn according to
the way their parents do things.
In summary, from my viewpoint, both alternatives have some benefits, but in the majority of scenarios, the former is a more desirable option for individuals. I think that protecting the environment is not only a moral duty,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
a wise investment for the future of humanity.Submitted by cathyielts22 on
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coherence cohesion
A clearer structure with distinct paragraphs for each view and your own would enhance readability and argument flow.
task achievement
Expanding on each point with more specific examples and explanations could strengthen your argument.
task achievement
Consider introducing your opinion more clearly in the introduction to guide the reader.
task achievement
You have presented both sides of the argument, which is good for task response.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion summarises your viewpoint well, clarifying your stance on the issue.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite