The number of obese children is increasong. Some think that shcools should make sports compulsory. Do you agree or disagree?
It can be noted that the rate of
children
who are obese has increased over the years, and therefore
, some are of the opinion that schools
should make sports
compulsory. In my opinion, I agree with such
a view because it can help children
change their lifestyle greatly.
Firstly
, when schools
make sports
compulsory, all the students will start having an active lifestyle. It can be noted that some students lack physical activity because they enjoy staying indoors, especially after school
hours. Moreover
, some of them are addicted to technological devices. Due to
this
fact, they cannot burn their calories, and in the long run, they start gaining a lot of weight. However
, when schools
make sports
compulsory, they do not have a choice about whether they like them or not. This
will help them stay fit even if they are not interested in doing exercise after school
hours.
Secondly
, some children
do not have responsible parents. In other words
, they do not pay attention to their diet, and they let their children
consume whatever they want. For example
, in America, the number of obese children
keeps on increasing every year, mainly because of the consumption of fast food and processed food at home. In this
case, if schools
make sports
compulsory, this
situation can be overcome because they can burn calories and maintain their shape. In addition
, when students are actively involved in sports
at school
, they will be interested in taking care of their health, and this
, as a result
, can undoubtedly give them awareness of the importance of a healthy diet and maintaining their weight.
To sum up
, I once again reaffirm my position that, in order to help children
stay fit and healthy, sports
should be made compulsory in every school
. If all schools
implemented this
practice, the issue of obesity among children
would drop significantly.Submitted by s_syedy on
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Example
Make sure to provide more varied examples to enrich your arguments even further. Including statistics, real-life examples, or citing studies could strengthen your position on compulsory sports in schools.
Coherence
Use transitional phrases to improve the flow between paragraphs and within them, ensuring a smoother reading experience.
Balance
Consider exploring the counterargument to provide a more balanced view. Acknowledging the opposing viewpoint and then refuting it can make your argument more persuasive.
Task Response
Your essay effectively addresses the topic, clearly stating your position and supporting it with logical reasons.
Coherence and Cohesion
The structure of your essay is logical, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. This organization significantly aids in the coherence and cohesion of your text.