People think that success in sports mainly depends on physical abilities while others think that there are other important factors. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #success #sports #abilities #factors

Today, some people believe that physical condition is the main reason for success among athletes because a strong

body

will outperform opponents in physical exercises, meanwhile, I think that regardless of the

body

, mental condition is much more essential. On the one hand, In sports, physical abilities are very important to reach the top of the career as a sportsman.

Correct pronoun usage

This

show examples

is because the major requirement for athletes is the strength and endurance of their bodies.

Therefore

, the bodies of sportsmen are very muscular, they train them in very hard conditions, and many people believe

that is

the main cause of their success.

For example

, boxing is a discipline, where a muscular

body

is very important, and every professional boxer has a very strong

body

. Mike Tyson, Muhammed Ali and others could not

reach

Verb problem

have

show examples

the success without it.

On the other hand

, the power of will and spirit is a key factor to be the best in the sport.

Body

is just a container of our soul, and our avatar in the material world. Many sportsmen realized it and understood that the pain of their bodies

Wrong verb form

was

show examples

nothing.

For instance

, Vinny Pazienca was a very famous boxer in the past, because after one of his fights, he had an accident. The consequence of it was so dangerous that he couple of months in the hospital, and doctors told him that he would never be able to do boxing,

However

, he continued training and after a couple of weeks all of his injuries healed, and he became a champion a few times. It illustrates that the power of will

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

can incarnate a miracle.

To conclude

, it is true that physical abilities are very important to become famous and successful, but the

body

is just like a car, It does not matter how much cost

this

car, much more necessary whether the driver controls it.

Submitted by vasilevici487 on Tue Apr 16 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

While your essay structure is good, try to enhance coherence by using a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more smoothly.

Language Accuracy

Ensure to proofread your essay to correct minor grammatical errors and typos for clearer communication.

Task Response

Consider adding more diverse and specific examples to strengthen your arguments and make your stance clearer.

Structure

You effectively introduced and concluded your essay, clearly presenting the discussion topic and your opinion.

Content

Your argument is well-balanced, discussing both views on the importance of physical strength and mental determination in sports success.

Examples

Good job providing examples to support your points, enhancing the reader's understanding of your arguments.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

313 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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People think that success in sports mainly depends on physical abilities while others think that there are other important factors. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

People are staying more and more at home, these days. What are the causes and effects.

Some people say that money is the major source of happiness do you agree or disagree

Many government spend a lot of money on art. Some people think this investment in art is necessary, but others say the money is better spent on improving health and education. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

A lot of people believe that the amount of violence shown on TV and in the cinema affects the actions of our young people and therefore increases the amount of violence in our society today. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? What can be done to reduce violence in our society today?

The inequality between rich and poor nations is now wider than it has ever been before. What do you think are the main causes of this difference and what do you think can be done to reduce the gap?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+