In many countries governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?
IN DIFFERENT NATIONS COUNCILS ARE SPENDING THEIR
MONEY
ON NEW EQUIPMENT TO CONFRONT THE PUBLIC. I PERSONALLY BELIEVE THAT THE
OVERPOPULATION IS MAKING IT HARDER FOR THE ADMINISTRATORS TO CONTROL THE PROBLEMS RELATED TO ITS RESIDENTS. Correct article usage
apply
ADDITIONALLY
, IT NEED TO APPRECIATE THAT INVESTING RESOURCES IN MANAGING PEOPLE
IS AS ESSENTIAL AS DEVELOPING THE COUNTRY.
AS THE TIME PASS, MORE AND MORE HUMAN WERE BORN FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD, NOT TO MENTION
A SINGLE COUNTRY. THE PHENOMENON COME IN PAIRED WITH RISING PROBLEMS IN SOCIETY LIKE SOCIAL ILLS AND MORE BECAUSE THERE ARE A LOT OF PEOPLE
IN A SQUARE. BY DEVELOPING THE TECHNOLOGY THAT CAN EFFICIENTLY FIND AND RISING
WITH THE INCOMING ISSUES, THE GOVERNMENTS MAY DO BETTER AT THEIR JOB OF ENSURING THE SAFETY OF THEIR INHABITANTS. THAT WHY THEY POUR THE Wrong verb form
RISE
MONEY
IN THE LATEST TOOL TO ACHIEVE THE GOAL.
BY INVESTING THE CASH IN IMPROVING THE SECURITY OF THE PEOPLE
, A NATION COUNCIL CAN GAIN A LOT OF BENEFITS LIKE THE TRUST OF ITS PEOPLE
, STEADY DEVELOPMENT AND MORE. WHILE
OTHERS MAY GIVE THEIR MONEY
TO FIND A WAY TO LIVE IN THE
OUTER SPACE, WHICH STILL CAN NOT BE PROVEN POSSIBLE ARE NOT AND CAN BECOME A HUGE LOSS FOR THE INVESTOR. Correct article usage
apply
WHEREAS
, THE USE
OF Correct word choice
PUBLIC USE
MONEY
PUBLIC IN
IMPROVES THE LIFE STANDARD OF Change preposition
apply
PEOPLE
ALWAYS PROVE
IT IS PROFITABLE IN ONE WAY OR ANOTHER. Correct subject-verb agreement
PROVES
THIS
SHOWED THAT THE USAGE OF GOVERNMENT MONEY
POURED INTO NEW TECHNOLOGY IS APPROPRIATE.
TO CONCLUDE
, BECAUSE THE
OVERPOPULATION IS MAKING IT HARDER TO SOLVE SOCIAL ISSUES, GOVERNMENTS ARE SPENDING Correct article usage
apply
MONEY
TO FIND MORE EFFICIENT INSTRUMENTS TO DEAL WITH THE RISING PROBLEMS. THIS
IS AN APPROPRIATE USAGE OF THE NATION'S CASH BECAUSE IT ENSURE HAPPINESS AND SAFETY FOR THE RESIDENTS.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Presentation
It's advisable to avoid using all capitals in your writing as it can make the essay difficult to read. Standard capitalization practices are more reader-friendly.
Content
Try to focus on providing clearer, more specific examples to support your arguments. This would enhance the relevance and depth of your essay.
Structure
Work on developing a clearer structure with well-defined paragraphs, each covering a specific aspect of the topic. This would greatly improve the logical flow of your essay.
Grammar
Consider revising your essay for grammatical accuracy and variety in sentence structure to make your arguments more coherent and compelling.
Task Response
You have successfully identified a relevant topic and provided a clear standpoint, which is crucial for task achievement.
Task Response
You show an understanding of the importance of discussing both the reasons for government investment in new technology and its appropriateness, which is good for addressing the essay prompt fully.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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