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Band 7

Some people believe that professionals such as doctors and engineers should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both views and give your own answers.

#people #professionals #doctors #engineers #work #country #answers
Some opinions claim that
experts
 should
work
 in the same
country
 where they were trained.
However
, the other says there are no rules to restrict what
country
 they will
work
 in. In
this
 essay, we are going to discuss both views and converge on one opinion.
It is clear that
experts
 are willing to
work
 with the
country
 that supports a lot. Especially in the engineering field, the quality of experimental tools has significant importance
due to
 their effectiveness on the results. With less financial or technical support, it is burdensome to achieve goals, because
experts
 should care about the budget and limitations.
However
,
on the other hand
, it is a national loss when
experts
 go to the other
country
. To educate the
experts
, plenty of expenditures occur,
such
 as research budget. Governments could not return their investment but only spend taxes to give benefits to other countries.
Therefore
, some companies make criteria that when employees want to study abroad, they have to
work
 the same years that they spent. Not only financial loss but
also
 those who acknowledge some credential information could leak important pieces of knowledge. In modern society, the power of information has a notable role and aligns with national power.
Thus
, these could be a tremendous disadvantage to their
country
.
To sum up
, it is obvious that
experts
 could want to go to different countries regarding to conditions each
country
 gives. Personally,
experts
 should
work
 in the same
country
 where they studied, especially if they had benefited from them.
Submitted by forbid403 on

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Task Achievement
Expand on your arguments with more depth to demonstrate a balanced discussion. While you've covered both views, providing more detailed examples could strengthen your points.
Coherence & Cohesion
To enhance coherence, make clearer transitions between paragraphs and ensure each one flows naturally from one to the next. Introducing signpost language could help with this.
Coherence & Cohesion
Consider adding a paragraph that explicitly contrasts the two views before concluding. This would show an ability to evaluate and synthesize information effectively, enhancing your argument.
Task Achievement
Good use of example and rationale to support arguments.
Coherence & Cohesion
The introduction and conclusion were clearly stated, setting the stage for the discussion and wrapping up your argument effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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