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Writing Samples
Band 3

People nowadays are buying wider range of household things (for example television, rice cooker) than in the past. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? #people #range #household #television #rice #cooker #development

#people #range #household #television #rice #cooker #development
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Due to
Linking Words
 the rapid growth of technology, the world has come a long way
therefore
Linking Words
 the lifestyle of people has changed a lot in the past few decades. In the midst of change , technology comes with new gadgets every day to make our lives easier and
comfortable
Correct quantifier usage
more comfortable
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. We become so dependable on
those
Correct determiner usage
this
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 equipment that we can not even imagine our life without
them
Correct pronoun usage
it
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. In the current scenario, it can be seen that people are more likely to buy a wide range of gadgets which
use
Wrong verb form
are used
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 in households like
tv
Fix the agreement mistake
TVs
show examples
, air conditioners, vacuum cleaners, rice cookers and many others. There is a range of conflicting arguments related to the assertion. A school of people thinks it's okay to upgrade ourselves with new technologies
while
Linking Words
on the contrary
Linking Words
 other communities opine with the notion . In the succeeding monograph , I intend to delve into the statement
as well as
Linking Words
 proffer examples to justify my point of view.
Submitted by shyamal017 on

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Introduction Clarity
Ensure your introduction clearly presents your opinion on whether it's a positive or negative development to engage the reader and set a clear direction for your essay.
Use of Examples
Develop your paragraphs with specific examples or evidence to support your points. This will strengthen your argument and provide a clearer understanding of your views.
Logical Flow
Try to maintain a logical flow of ideas throughout your essay. Use linking words and phrases to connect your sentences and paragraphs more effectively.
Conclusion Clarity
In your conclusion, clearly restate your opinion and summarize the main points of your argument. This helps reinforce your stance and provides a clear end to your essay.
Topic Understanding
Your essay initiates an important discussion on the impact of technology on lifestyle changes, indicating a good grasp of the topic.
Range of Ideas
You've introduced a variety of household gadgets, which shows your ability to think broadly about the subject.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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