Some people believe that children should be banned from using their phones during the school day. Others believe that children should be allowed to use their phones. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Nowadays, We are living in the era of technology and one of the most technological
trend
Change to a plural noun
trends

The singular countable noun trend follows the quantifier one of, which requires a plural noun. Consider using a plural noun or a different quantifier.

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is the cell phone.
While
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

some people people argue that
childten
Correct your spelling
children

If you don’t want childten to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

should be prohibited from using their
phones
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

during school days, others
advocated
Wrong verb form
advocate

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb advocated. Consider changing it.

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that
phones
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

should be
in
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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available for
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. From my point of view , I totally agree that
students
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

should not be allowed to use their mobiles in
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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school days. For those who
are agree
Change the verb form
agree

It appears that the form of the verb agree does not work with are in this sentence.

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that
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

should not use their telephones during
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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school days ,
a varied reasons
Correct the article-noun agreement
varied reasons
a varied reason

The indefinite article a may not be required with the plural noun reasons in this sentence. Consider removing the article, or changing the noun to singular.

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supported
Wrong verb form
support

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb supported. Consider changing it.

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this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

idea.
Firstly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
phones
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

may cause distribution and prevent
students
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

from being
consentration
Correct your spelling
concentration

If you don’t want consentration to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

during the class.
That
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

is
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb is appears to be unnecessary here.

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mean
Replace the word
means

The word mean doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

will be busy
by
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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looking at their
phones
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and they lose their focus
to
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
the lessons.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, a study from
UK
Correct article usage
the UK

Your article usage with the geographic name UK may be incorrect.

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illustrates that 89% of
students
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

loose
Replace the word
lose

The word loose may be used incorrectly. Review the following notes to determine the appropriate usage for your context.

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their focus
due to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

using
phones
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

or laptops during
learning
Correct article usage
the learning

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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proceee
Correct your spelling
process

If you don’t want proceee to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

.
Secondly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
banned
Wrong verb form
banning

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb banned. Consider changing it.

show examples
students
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

from using their mobiles may enhance
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

students
Change noun form
students'
student's

It seems that this noun form may be incorrect.

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Add an article
the opportunity
an opportunity
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opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities

It seems that opportunity may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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to achieve high marks and
then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

achieve their goals.
In other words
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
childen
Correct your spelling
children

If you don’t want childen to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

will 100% pay attention to their teacher's talk which
help
Change the verb form
helps

The plural verb help does not appear to agree with the singular subject their teacher's talk. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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them to understand
Correct word choice
and acieve
show examples
acieve
Correct your spelling
achieve

If you don’t want acieve to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

high progress quickly.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, If the student sits
a
Change preposition
on a

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
schoolnwithout
Correct your spelling
school without

If you don’t want schoolnwithout to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

telephone, they will do everything well. For all the above reasons,
phones
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

should not be given to them On the
othr
Correct your spelling
other

If you don’t want othr to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

hand, other people supposed that
students
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

should be given their
phones
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. they assumed that
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

may help
students
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

a lot in the educational learning process.
to
Capitalize word
To

The word to should be capitalized in this context.

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illustrate
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, a lot of different educational apps are available on
phones
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

so that
students
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

can use them to engage
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
English
Correct article usage
an English

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
speaking app may be very helpful For EFL
students
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
As it
Correct word choice
It

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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can give them the opportunity to learn
speaks
Verb problem
to speak

There may be a verb use issue here.

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easily cause
that
Correct word choice
apply

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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they will read and listen . To
sump
Correct your spelling
sum

The word sump doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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up mobile
phones
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have

It seems that the verb has does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

show examples
become an essential part
from
Change preposition
of

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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our life but
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

should be
obeserved
Correct your spelling
observed

If you don’t want obeserved to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

and get
controled
Correct your spelling
controlled
control

If you don’t want controled to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

from dealing with it
directhy
Correct your spelling
directly

If you don’t want directhy to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

.
From
Change the preposition
In

The preposition From may be incorrect. Consider changing it to another preposition.

show examples
my opinion ,
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

should be
panned
Correct your spelling
banned

The word panned doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
from using
phones
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.

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Introduction clarity
Make sure your introduction provides a clear preview of the discussion and your position.
Sentence variety
Work on varying your sentence structures to improve readability and sophistication in your writing.
Paragraphing
Consider using paragraphs to clearly separate your ideas, making your argument easier to follow.
Spelling and Grammar
Keep a close eye on spelling and grammatical accuracy to enhance the overall clarity and professionalism of your essay.
Use of examples
Cite specific, relevant examples to strengthen your arguments and make them more convincing.
Conclusion effectiveness
Ensure your conclusion succinctly summarizes the main points of your essay and reiterates your opinion clearly.
Task Response
You have addressed both views and provided a clear opinion, which is good for task response.
Vocabulary Range
You've used a reasonable range of vocabulary to express your ideas.
Organization
There's an effort to organize ideas logically, which helps in understanding your argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Minimize
  • Distractions
  • Prohibit
  • Cyberbullying
  • Inappropriate
  • Encourage
  • Social interaction
  • Educational apps
  • Safety tool
  • Emergencies
  • Responsible use
  • Balanced approach
  • Restrictions
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