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Band 4.5

Some people think that international car-free day will help in reducing fuel usage and air pollution. Others believe there is an effective alternative to this. To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

#people #car-free #fuel #usage #air #pollution #alternative
It
Correct pronoun usage
There
show examples
 is
ongoing
Add an article
an ongoing
show examples
 debate about
international car-free
Correct your spelling
International Car-free
show examples
day
Capitalize word
Day
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. Some
people
 believe that
this
 day
decrease
Change the verb form
decreases
show examples
 the
procent
Correct your spelling
percentage
 of contamination and uncontrol fuel usage,
however
,others think
that is
have
Verb problem
are
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 some other
method
Fix the agreement mistake
methods
show examples
 to reduce
this
. I agree that has some
alternatives
Change the noun form
alternative
show examples
 methods and in
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
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i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will prove
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
.
To begin
 with, working with our society and
pay
Wrong verb form
paying
show examples
 more attention
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
 these problems will help
people
 to understand what they should do.
Furthermore
,the more effective way to teach children in school,how
become
Add the particle
to become
show examples
friendly
Add an article
a friendly
show examples
environment
 and which skills you should have to reduce
this
.
For example
,in Russia the main emphasis on
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
show examples
 studying at school,where children understand all aspects and gain new skills
such
 as cleaning
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the territory,riding by bike to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
school,which can reduce
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
air pollution and especially,
sort
Wrong verb form
sorting
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
rubbish into
right
Add an article
the right
show examples
 section of the bin.
Therefore
,they will reduce the
procent
Correct your spelling
percentage
 of garbage on the street, and understand
this
 political system from
early
Correct article usage
the early
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 years.
However
,many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
 do not care about their green heritage,which can lead them to have some ecological problems. In many
part
Change to a plural noun
parts
show examples
 of the world
people
faced
Add a missing verb
are faced
show examples
 with
this
 problem after time,when they could solve it. Regardless
citizenship
Change preposition
of citizenship
show examples
, many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
 can
throw-up
Correct your spelling
throw up
show examples
 their filter of cigarettes to the ground,but they are able to throw
that
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
 garbage
bin
Fix the agreement mistake
bins
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 on the street.
Furthermore
,
this
 case has
chance
Add an article
a chance
the chance
show examples
 to make more
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
 that pollution,and lead to
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
wildfire
Fix the agreement mistake
wildfires
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the forests or fields.
Thus
, if we will set up some rules and show
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
examples of
this
,we will certainly reduce the problems with contamination and save our
environment
.
To sum up
, if summarize
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 two reasons,we can achieve
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 balance between pollution and
friendly
Correct article usage
a friendly
show examples
environment
,which will improve
situation
Correct article usage
the situation
show examples
 and stability
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
in our world
Submitted by batirka06 on

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Organization
Consider stressing the importance of organization in your essay. Having clear paragraph divisions and a distinct flow from the introduction, through the body paragraphs, to the conclusion can greatly enhance coherence and cohesion.
Paragraph Development
Try to ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea, which is clearly stated in the topic sentence. Then, develop this idea further with explanations, examples, or data.
Task Response Clarity
To improve task response, ensure your opinion is clear and directly addresses the essay question. Include it in both the introduction and conclusion for reinforcement.
Grammar and Sentence Structure
Revise your essay to correct grammatical errors and improve sentence structure. This will make your arguments more persuasive and easier to understand.
Use of Examples
You provided relevant examples and discussed different perspectives, which strengthens your argument.
Topic Engagement
You addressed the topic and showed an effort to include a range of ideas about solving environmental problems.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • environmentally friendlier alternatives
  • sustainable living
  • transportation choices
  • implementation
  • urban planning
  • non-motorized transportation
  • economic impacts
  • feasibility
  • robust public transportation systems
  • technological and policy innovations
  • smart traffic management systems
  • congestion pricing
  • incentives
  • low-emission vehicles
  • education and awareness campaigns
  • cultural shift
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