Some people think most crimes are the result of circumstances like poverty and other social problems. Other believe that they are caused by people who are bad in nature discuss both views and give your own opinion.
It is argued that crimes are outcomes of penury.
On the other hand
, some individuals think they are innate bad humans. Here I will discuss both views and I will give my opinion.
However
, poverty is an important topic in every community because it creates unpleasant situations for people for example
, when young individuals do not have any expertise and are unemployed in society. They have many problems with their economy by the way most of these people have families and their family needs many facilities and amenities. Therefore
, they are obliged to go toward some crimes. Like theft and criminal works. For example
, a reporter on television has informed us that most offenders are married and jobless . of course, this
news has gotten from a valuable source like police news, So they have many difficulties and issues in their life. felons believe that if they had had a good job, they would not be an offender.
Moreover
, some nations live and grow in criminal families and they usually have unsupervised friends. These folk usually have a bad nature because crime has deposited in their essence for example
, police declared in the news that many convicts have unsuitable families and usually have criminal children. Police notified that if these offenders had lived in a good family, they would have not been culprits.
I believe that in every publication there are some offenders that should be found and must be rectified to their situation also
the government should provide a good context for young people in terms of work entertainment and education because some crimes spring from lack of a
good training.
In conclusion, poverty usually leads some crowd to guilt Remove the article
apply
also
having a bad family makes an aggressive personality and miscreant.Submitted by mrhoshangi87 on
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Task Achievement
You've done a good job of presenting both views and your own opinion, which is key to task achievement. To further improve, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea for clarity.
Coherence & Cohesion
Incorporating a wider range of linking words and phrases could enhance the flow between your ideas, contributing to better coherence.
Task Achievement
Using specific examples and evidence to back your points can significantly strengthen your argument. Try to include more detailed examples relevant to the topic.
Coherence & Cohesion
Work on sentence structure to avoid run-on sentences or fragments. This will also help in making your essay more cohesive and easier to follow.
Task Achievement
You've clearly introduced both views and your own perspective, providing a balanced discussion.
Coherence & Cohesion
The essay structure, with clear paragraphs for each view and your opinion, helps in following your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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