IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below gives information about the number of social networking sites people used in Canada in 2014 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison. L s where relevan

The chart below gives information about the number of social networking sites people used in Canada in 2014 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison. L s where relevan
#information #sites #people #canada #summarise #features #comparison #l #relevan
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The bar graph illustrates the data about the number of six different social network
sites
Use synonyms
 pupil usage in Canada between 2024 to 2015.
Overall
Linking Words
, one site
uses
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
 presented the highest amount in both years
while
Linking Words
 five
apps
Change the noun form
app
show examples
 uses showed
tiny
Correct article usage
a tiny
show examples
 proportion in
Canadian
Correct article usage
the Canadian
show examples
 multiple networking sector.
According to
Linking Words
 the graph, there
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 no
sites
Use synonyms
 people
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
accounted
by
Change preposition
for
show examples
 22% and 21% in 2014 and 2015 .
One
Change preposition
In one
show examples
 site human
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
recorded
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
 significant amount by 36% and over
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
25% in 2015.There
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 similar percentages by 23% and 24% during the time period by two
sites
Use synonyms
 uses.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, three
sites
Use synonyms
 showed by 12% in 2014 and they increased by 16% in 2015.
However
Linking Words
, four
sites
Use synonyms
 and five
sites
Use synonyms
percented
Correct your spelling
presented
per cent
 the smallest contribution of social network
sites
Use synonyms
 by 8% and 8%
in addition
Linking Words
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
 lowest percentage by 2% and double in 2015 respectively.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
 of one
Use synonyms
sites
Change to a singular noun
site
show examples
 uses multiple social
network
Change to a plural noun
networks
show examples
was huge
Verb problem
,
show examples
 and
Change the article
a
the
show examples
number of five
sites
Use synonyms
uses
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
 accounted tiny proportion
usage
Change preposition
of usage
show examples
 in Canada.
Submitted by nimeshafernando126 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words sites with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: