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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Nowadays, a lot of offices employ open-space designs instead of separate rooms for work. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#offices #open-space #designs #rooms #work #outweigh
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In the present age, whether open-space designs for
offices
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 provide more benefits than traditional ones has sparked much debate. Some people assert that
open
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an open
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 layout is beneficial in terms of improving employers’ collaboration
whereas
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 many others argue that in
offices
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 with open-spade
design
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design,
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workers
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 find it challenging to focus on their job owing to constant interruption. In
this
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 essay, I will consider both pros and cons of the discussion.
Firstly
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, open
spaces
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 as a symbol of openness and honesty may stimulate employees’ open-mindedness and tolerance. More specifically, open
spaces
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 may lead to broad-minded
workers
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 who are more likely to collaborate with each other, approve of
co-
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coworkers’
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workers
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’ ideas,
as well as
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 combine diverse perspectives.
For instance
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, nowadays it is typical
of
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for
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workers
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 in private
offices
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 to arrange online meetings or conferences.
However
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, a live contact provided by the open layout helps co-
workers
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 to understand each other better and find the solution more productively. As far as the drawbacks are concerned,
inability
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the inability
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 to focus on
work
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due to
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 plentiful distractions in open-space
offices
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decrease
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decreases
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work
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 efficiency over the course of the day. If you are constantly able to see your colleagues passing by or hear a conversation between others, you are incapable of focusing on your task.
For example
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, no one would manage to come up with unique ideas for a brand-new project if a co-worker sitting in front of you is wondering if you watched a football match at the weekend or who you will vote for in the elections
of
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for
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 president.
Therefore
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, companies which don’t emphasize private working
spaces
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 run the risk that their employees might enjoy each other’s company throughout the working day which would reduce total
work
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 output.
To sum up
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,
although
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, open-space designs for
offices
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 might enhance
company’s
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a company’s
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 efficiency by helping employers to continuously keep in touch and tackle
with
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apply
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the
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apply
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problems more quickly, distractions
ocurring
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occurring
 in
open
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an open
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 layout can
also
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 prevent
workers
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 from being absorbed in their
work
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 and make them less prolific. On the basis of the above discussion, I believe that combining open
spaces
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 with private
offices
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 in an enterprise is the best solution since various situations require different kinds of working
spaces
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.
Submitted by oimigle on

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coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph focuses on a single idea to maintain clarity and cohesiveness. Although your essay does a good job of this, ensuring each paragraph's main idea is distinct and fully explored can enhance readability.
task achievement
To further improve task achievement, try to integrate more varied and detailed examples that directly support your arguments. This will strengthen your position and make your essay more convincing.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction neatly introduces the topic and provides a clear indication of the essay’s direction.
logical structure
You effectively use logical connectors to transition between ideas, which greatly aids the essay’s flow and coherence.
supported main points
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the essay, reflecting on both sides of the argument before giving a reasoned opinion.
complete response
You clearly address the task, presenting a balanced view on the advantages and disadvantages of open-space offices before stating your final opinion.
clear comprehensive ideas
The essay articulates ideas clearly and comprehensively, making it easy to follow your argumentation.
relevant specific examples
Use of specific examples, such as the comparison between online meetings and live interactions, effectively illustrates your points, although incorporating more varied examples could strengthen the argument further.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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