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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think that success is the best indicator for intelligence, while others think that intelligence can be measured in other ways. What is your opinion?

#people #success #indicator #intelligence
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It is believed that
intelligence
 is measured by the
overall
 success of the individual, which itself is a vague concept. In my opinion, there are two factors which help to answer the question of how smart a person is,
such
 as the
IQ
test
 and the difficulty of problems
one
 can solve. Humanity has developed a way to measure the level of
intelligence
 among the population and it is the
IQ
test
. The
test
 was invented decades ago and has proven itself as a legitimate instrument for comparing
people
 by their brains. The average intelligent specimen is considered to have an
IQ
 of
one
 hundred, those who are below
this
 level are less smart, and those with higher marks are surely found as outstanding thinkers.
For example
, most scientists,
such
 as Albert Einstein, possessed a rare record of
IQ
 above 180 points.
As a result
,
people
 with higher
IQ
 results are capable of connecting the dots together, which others, less intelligent species, are not. Another
intelligence
 measurement factor to consider is how difficult the problem that a person can solve in a shorter amount of time. I stick to the fact, that logical thinking is a crucial aspect of the question of
intelligence
 since it represents faster problem-solving.
This
 is particularly important because smarter
people
 are able to skip several logical steps and still understand the meaning of the issue,
while
 others require a more detailed explanation of it.
Moreover
, there are some problems, to which almost no
one
 can find a solution .
This
 is illustrated by the famous Russian mathematician named Perelman, who found proof for
one
 of the unsolvable problems in the world, the theory of Poincare, and who is currently living with his mom in a tiny apartment and considered a genius rather than a successful person. In summary, I think that successful
people
 can be highly
intelligence
, but not vice-versa. It is essential to consider the
IQ
test
 and the logical thinking of an individual to roughly estimate the
intelligence
 of
one
. Some of the smartest
people
 in the world live in poverty and need to be treated with more respect in order to be recognised as geniuses.
Submitted by dulskywork on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to structure your response. However, some points, such as logical thinking and problem-solving, can be better explained with more examples or details to improve coherence.
task achievement
Ensure that every point you make is linked back to the main topic clearly. Sometimes, the connection between a point and how it measures intelligence could be strengthened.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetition and keep your sentences concise and to the point. This will help to improve the overall readability of your essay.
task achievement
You have addressed the task prompt well, discussing both sides of the argument and stating your own opinion clearly.
task achievement
You have used relevant examples to support your points, which enhances the clarity of your arguments.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with a distinct introduction and conclusion, which aids in readability.
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