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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Many students like to get involved in extra- curricular activities at university such as social clubs and sports. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?v

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Nowadays, there are too many students who tend to play several different kinds of sports activities in schools and universities which might present both advantages and disadvantages. In
this
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 essay, I will mention the effects of these habits supported by real-life examples based on my life experience. Research has found that individuals have become more intelligent and creative when they combine both sport and science.
For instance
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, lifting weights and football will increase cognitive mental health so dramatically.
Therefore
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, students will encourage themselves to do better in school and boost their marks by getting high results.
Furthermore
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, It’s a significant path to communicate and engage with other people by creating a new cycle of friends.
This
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 will show more sources of education methods supported by play activities.
In addition
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, an enormous type of play activities like cardio will make people look fit and shape, which will build self-confidence.
On the other hand
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, these
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
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 might have the same disadvantages like destruction and consuming individual time which will lower the quality of the education and classes. The fundamental reason for
that is
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 weak management and procrastination will lead to issues
such
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 as failing and dropping out of university.
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, basketball players in the USE specifically in NBA clubs, players tend to play twice a day and most of them are kicked out. That’s why the homeless and unemployed have increased in the past few days. In conclusion, one should balance their life and one must compromise between study and athletics.
However
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, it is a double-edged sword edge and seeks the benefits with the least damage.

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Introduction
Introduce your essay with a brief overview of the topic including both advantages and disadvantages before diving into details. This helps set the context for the readers.
Structure
Ensure a clear distinction between paragraphs for discussing advantages and disadvantages. Start with a topic sentence for clarity.
Language
Use more varied and complex sentence structures to enhance the fluency of your essay. Avoid repetitive sentence beginnings.
Examples
When presenting examples, ensure they are realistic and directly support your point. The reference to the NBA and homelessness seems exaggerated and unclear in its connection to the main argument.
Conclusion
Work on a clearer, more structured conclusion that summarises your points without introducing new ideas.
Content
Ensure accuracy when making claims. Check facts and provide realistic, relevant examples that strengthen your argument.
Task Response
You've made a good attempt to cover the topic from both the advantages and disadvantages perspective, showing an understanding of the task.
Examples
Inclusion of personal experience and examples to illustrate points shows an attempt to make your essay relatable and grounded.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • extra-curricular activities
  • soft skills
  • teamwork
  • leadership
  • communication skills
  • workplace
  • mental and physical well-being
  • stress
  • physical fitness
  • balanced lifestyle
  • academic performance
  • network
  • time mismanagement
  • academic responsibilities
  • financial strain
  • membership fees
  • equipment purchases
  • travel expenses
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