Some people think that all children should learn about history at school. Others however, believe that other subjects are more relevant to children's lives today. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
A lot of individuals argue that all kids must study ancient cultures and civilians at kindergartens.
However
, other people believe that recent materials are more practical for young students. So , is the latter view the best for children or the initial?
On one hand, without any doubt, the history
of any nation may constitute the most important part of its formation. What is more, the history
of states is not a mere subject,
but expresses their cultures , accomplishments and even their current century. Remove the comma
apply
For example
, each states
in the world have a special Change to a singular noun
state
day
every year and this
day
their
are celebrated as its national Replace the word
there
day
a lot of developing countries organised
Autonomy Wrong verb form
organise
day
. For Capitalize word
Day
this
, the history
of nations has to be learned by all kids .
On the other hand
, a enormous experts believe that educational institutions must be teaching only recent subjects. In addition
, these materials may be more useful for students and prepared
them for their futuristic jobs . Wrong verb form
prepare
For instance
, these days job marketing requires excellent qualifications and soft skills
power such
as everyone should be have
more than one language and Change the verb form
have
also
having to be perfect with computer skills
. For this
, any teaching services must provide these skills
for their students and must not waste their time on undesirable subjects in the future.
To sum up
, although
soft skills
power
are more practical and are considered the key to the success in future, but Correct word choice
and power
also
the history
of any nation is also
very important. So, I believe that any student should study history
to know more and more about his country and also
about the world.Submitted by mohammedelhassan811 on
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introduction
Ensure your introduction clearly presents the topic and outlines your viewpoint. This sets a solid foundation for your essay.
cohesion
Use a range of linking devices to improve the flow of your essay. While your essay has some coherence, it could benefit from phrases that more clearly connect ideas and paragraphs.
balance
When discussing opposing viewpoints, make sure to fully explore each perspective before giving your own opinion. This helps in providing a balanced argument and demonstrates a complete response to the task.
examples
Try to use specific examples to support your points. This not only makes your argument stronger but also more engaging for the reader.
vocabulary
Be mindful of using a varied and accurate range of vocabulary to express your ideas. Avoid repetition and try to demonstrate the breadth of your language knowledge.
topic coverage
Your essay effectively addresses both views on the importance of learning history versus more contemporary subjects.
conclusion
You provided a clear conclusion that summarizes your viewpoint and the arguments presented in your essay.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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