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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

As a part of their education, many students work at a company for short period of time without a salary. Are there more advantage than disadvantage to this?

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There has been quite an obvious discussion around the topic of unpaid internships.
While
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 some people believe that young people should only focus on their studies, I would argue that they should go through a free internship during their learning. I will explain my reasons in
this
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 essay. There is no doubt that working without pay has some negative effect
to
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on
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students
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while
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 they are studying process.
This
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 is because some
students
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 who
work
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 as
a
Correct article usage
apply
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volunteer
Fix the agreement mistake
volunteers
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 will not get enough time for their homework or lessons.
For example
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,
students
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 have internships after they finish class so they will not prepare for their homework, and they will less concentrate in their classroom.
As a result
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, they need to focus on study to pass their exam.
However
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, it is worth pointing out that there are many benefits of working as a volunteer
while
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 they are studying at university.
This
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 is based on the fact that pupils can increase their knowledge when they
work
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 in the real workplace.
For instance
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, in Australia, many colleges provide internships for their
students
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 who study
in
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apply
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commercial cookery to
work
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 at hotels, which can improve their knowledge and practical skills.
Consequently
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, working as trainees can gain
work
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 experience that can relate to their future careers. In conclusion, we can observe that working for a short time without pay is a great way to develop skills and gain
work
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 experience for their job in the future.
Overall
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, I firmly believe that
this
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 action has more advantages than disadvantages in their life.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single idea to maintain clarity and coherence.
task achievement
Expand on your examples with more detail to strengthen your argument and make it more persuasive.
task achievement
Try to balance the discussion of advantages and disadvantages more equally to fully address the essay prompt.
coherence cohesion
Good structure with clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
task achievement
Effective use of examples to support your main points.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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