in many countries, women are allowed to take maternity leave from their jobs during the first month after the birth of their baby. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

In many countries, the women should have a monthly period to rest after spawning. I think that,
while
this
trend has some minor downsides, the merits are far greater because it benefits the individual
as well as
the society. On the one hand, the government banning
this
rule is very reasonable with some benefits it has.
First,
it ensures
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the mother's well-being, after giving birth, each mother's
health
will be very tired and exhausted so a good rest will help to improve both the mental
health
and physical
health
of pregnant
mothers
, avoiding stress and postpartum depression risks.
Secondly
, it supports babies's
health
conditions. To explain, if
mothers
are taken care of carefully and have enough time to relax, the newborn babies will
also
have a good source of breast milk and
this
also
enhances long-term child development through early nurturing and care.
In addition
, socially,it encourages higher female participation in the labour force by enabling women to balance career and motherhood.
Furthermore
, it might contribute to gender quality by normalizing parental leave for postpartum
mothers
.
Besides
, there are some drawbacks
such
as causing the loss of employees for short-term economic companies and leading to an increase in workload for other employees covering for those on leave.
In addition
, having some challenges in small businesses to accommodate long periods of leave without affecting operations might reinforce that caregiving is primarily a woman's responsibility.
However
, the disadvantages mentioned above look insignificant when compared to the merits of maternity leave. In conclusion, the healing period for
mothers
after giving birth plays a pivotal role, it helps babies's mum both mental and physical
health
so some shortcomings it brings that can not outweigh the benefits. The government should regulate the rational rules for postpartum
mothers
.
Submitted by nhuquynhbn2004 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Specific Examples
Work on improving the clarity of specific examples to strengthen your argument. Rich, detailed examples support your points more compellingly.
Sentence Structure
Consider varying your sentence structures to enhance readability and flow. While your essay is logically structured, greater variety in sentence construction can improve engagement and coherence.
Balanced Argument
You've successfully acknowledged both sides of the argument, providing a balanced view before stating a clear opinion.
Introduction & Conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion are effectively formulated, providing a clear outline and summary of your viewpoints, which propels the coherence of your essay.
Logical Structure
The essay upholds a logical structure throughout, which aids in maintaining the reader's engagement and understanding of your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • maternity leave
  • essential bonding
  • recovery time
  • mental health
  • postpartum depression
  • long-term child development
  • female participation
  • labor force
  • gender equality
  • parental leave
  • economic impacts
  • temporary loss
  • workload
  • small businesses
  • accommodate
  • operations
  • perpetuating
  • gender stereotypes
  • caregiving
What to do next:
Look at other essays: