Topic: Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent, do you agree or disagree?

In contemporary discourse on public

health

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, the role of

governments

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in mitigating illness and disease remains pivotal.

While

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some argue that the primary focus should be on reducing environmental

pollution

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and tackling housing problems to prevent

health

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issues, others contend that

this

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approach may overlook other significant factors. In

this

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essay, I will explore both perspectives and argue that

while

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addressing environmental

pollution

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and housing problems is crucial, a comprehensive public

health

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strategy must encompass broader considerations.

To begin

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with, there is substantial evidence supporting the idea that environmental

pollution

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and inadequate housing conditions contribute significantly to the prevalence of illnesses and diseases. Poor air quality, contaminated water sources, and exposure to hazardous substances are directly linked to respiratory ailments, cardiovascular diseases, and certain types of cancers.

Similarly

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, overcrowded or substandard housing exacerbates the spread of infectious diseases and mental

health

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issues among populations.

Therefore

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, it is imperative for

governments

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to prioritize initiatives aimed at reducing

pollution

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levels and improving housing standards to safeguard public

health

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Moreover

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, addressing environmental and housing challenges aligns with the principles of social justice and equity. Vulnerable communities,

such

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as low-income households and marginalized populations, disproportionately bear the burden of environmental degradation and inadequate housing. By focusing efforts on mitigating

pollution

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and enhancing housing conditions,

governments

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can promote

health

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equity and ensure that all individuals have access to clean and safe environments conducive to well-being.

However

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, it is essential to recognize that the prevention of illness and disease requires a multifaceted approach that goes beyond environmental and housing interventions. Factors

such

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as access to healthcare services, education, socioeconomic disparities, and lifestyle

behaviors

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behaviours

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also

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significantly influence

health

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outcomes. Neglecting these aspects in

favor

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favour

show examples

of a singular focus on

pollution

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and housing may limit the effectiveness of public

health

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strategies.

Furthermore

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, there exists a complex interplay between environmental sustainability and public

health

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While

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reducing

pollution

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is essential for immediate

health

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benefits, long-term

health

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outcomes

also

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depend on broader environmental conservation efforts. Neglecting environmental protection in

favor

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favour

show examples

of short-term

health

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gains may lead to unintended consequences in the future,

such

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as climate change-related

health

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hazards. In conclusion,

while

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I agree that

governments

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should prioritize efforts to reduce environmental

pollution

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and address housing problems as part of a comprehensive public

health

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strategy, I believe that

this

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approach should be integrated with broader

health

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determinants. By adopting a holistic perspective that encompasses environmental sustainability, social equity, and healthcare access,

governments

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can effectively prevent illness and promote population

health

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in the long term.

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Apr 22, 2024

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task achievement

Be sure to include specific examples and data to strengthen your arguments. While you've provided a comprehensive discussion, adding real-world examples or citing recent studies could make your points more persuasive.

task achievement

Explore different viewpoints more explicitly. You have mentioned that there are other significant factors beyond pollution and housing issues, but delving into these alternative aspects could enhance your argument's depth.

task achievement

Maintain a clear focus on the essay prompt throughout your response. While it's beneficial to consider broader public health strategies, ensure your main argument directly addresses the question of whether focusing on reducing pollution and housing problems is sufficient for preventing illness.

coherence cohesion

Use transitions smoothly between paragraphs to enhance the flow of your essay. You've done well in structuring your essay logically, but look for opportunities to link ideas more seamlessly between sections for greater cohesion.

coherence cohesion

Consider employing varying sentence structures and syntactical patterns to add stylistic diversity to your writing, lending it a more engaging and dynamic quality.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are well-defined, framing the essay's argument effectively.

coherence cohesion

Your essay demonstrates a strong logical structure, making your arguments easy to follow.

task achievement

You've managed to maintain relevance to the topic throughout the essay, effectively addressing the question posed.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

6 paragraphs

412 words

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Topic: Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent, do you agree or disagree?

You have seen an advertisement for part-time work in a hotel for three months over the summer. Write a letter to the manager. In your letter Say what experience you have Ask what the work involves Enquire about conditions

In order to solve traffic problems, governments should tax private car owners heavily and use the money to improve public transportation. What are the advantages and disadvantages of such a solution?

Do the advantages of supermarket outweight the disadvantages?

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some think schools should rewards students who have the best academic results, while others think it’s more important to reward students who achieve other types of success (such as sports, music, and good behavior). Discuss both views and give your own opinion.