Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Government officials are obliged to reduce housing problems and environmental

pollution

Use synonyms

for the purpose of preventing disease and illness. I agree that

this

Linking Words

action is completely necessary

due to

Linking Words

how

health

Add an article

the health

show examples

of citizens and ecosystems may benefit

overall

Linking Words

. It is obvious that the environment which surrounds humans

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

the main

factors

Fix the agreement mistake

factor

show examples

deciding their health.

Which

Correct pronoun usage

This

show examples

proofs

Replace the word

proves

show examples

why environmental

pollution

Use synonyms

and housing problems are the two main culprits

Change preposition

apply

show examples

causing disease.

Therefore

Linking Words

, it enforces the need

for reducing

Change preposition

to reduce

show examples

those issues. If

problem solving

Add a hyphen

problem-solving

show examples

is successful, humans will gain the benefits of vigorous health for many years to come

as a result

Linking Words

Thus

Linking Words

, countries should not hesitate to invest their effort to solve the crisis of

pollution

Use synonyms

and bad accommodation management. People will not be the only

one

Correct pronoun usage

ones

show examples

gaining the benefits from

this

Linking Words

situation if

that is

Linking Words

the case. Evidently, animals are

also

Linking Words

suffering from human pollutants and poor housing as ecosystems are destroyed and contaminated every second. Ultimately, the

consequence

Fix the agreement mistake

consequences

show examples

of those disasters might reach the residents

through

Change preposition

show examples

some way in the near future.

As a consequence

Linking Words

, a catastrophe may result if nothing is done about

this

Linking Words

problem.

For instance

Linking Words

, a mass of land

consists

Wrong verb form

consisting

show examples

of enormous amounts of trash is floating around the Great Pacific and causing various unhygienic issues, and it will lead to more serious and inevitable consequences if not dealt with now. In conclusion, whilst some may disagree, proponents

such

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as myself will go

along with

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the idea of investing in solving

pollution

Use synonyms

and issues related to accommodation.

This

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will be to ensure a safe and healthy future for humans and wildlife.

[email protected]Mon Apr 22 2024

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Introduction & Conclusion

Ensure the introduction directly addresses the question, outlining your stance clearly to set the tone for the essay.

Supporting Examples

Try to include more specific examples and statistics to support your arguments. Real-world examples or data can make your arguments more convincing.

Cohesion

Use a variety of cohesive devices to demonstrate the relationship between ideas more clearly. While your essay has a good logical flow, occasionally, transitions could be smoother.

Grammar & Spelling

Be cautious with occasional grammar and spelling errors. These can detract from the clarity of your ideas.

Content Relevance

You've effectively outlined the link between environmental issues and human welfare, providing a solid basis for your argument.

Conclusion

Your conclusion does well to summarize the essay, reinforcing your stance on the issue.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

265 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

preventive healthcare
environmental regulations
respiratory diseases
public health policies
sanitation facilities
urban planning
communicable diseases
socio-economic factors
sustainable development
government intervention
healthcare infrastructure
industrial emissions
air quality index
affordable housing
mental wellbeing

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