the most important aim of science should be to improve people's live. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#aim #science #people

Although

our life has been getting better as

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

scientific technology has been improving, it is undeniable that we

also

need to aim

Change preposition

for

show examples

balanced evolution for both human and other

lives

including

environment

Add an article

the environment

show examples

. Because

human

Fix the agreement mistake

humans

show examples

can not

be prioritized

Wrong verb form

prioritise

show examples

themselves

than

Change preposition

over

show examples

others.

Firstly

, there is one statement we can deny that

science

Replace the word

scientific

show examples

evolution comes with

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

serious

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

such

as non-ethical

laboratory

Fix the agreement mistake

laboratories

show examples

climate

Correct word choice

and climate

show examples

change. Many innocent

lives

had to

sacrifice

Wrong verb form

be sacrificed

show examples

in order to

enable

Verb problem

make

show examples

people’s

lives

better.

Moreover

, we

are not give

Change the verb form

are not given

are not giving

show examples

the right to destroy our land as needed. Countless producing plastic products and using them lead to climate change.

And

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

scientist

Fix the agreement mistake

Scientists

show examples

and other experts say there is no solution for us to re-save the

planet

Change noun form

planet's

show examples

environment

which is left as our heritage to

our

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

next next

generation

. Our next

generation

has to be taken over a heavy burden. So, scientific improvement should stop non-ethical experiments by using

animal

Fix the agreement mistake

animals

show examples

. Because other

lives

have to

considered

Add a missing verb

be considered

show examples

same

Correct article usage

the same

show examples

human-being

Correct your spelling

human beings

show examples

. If one

specie

Fix the agreement mistake

species

show examples

go through

Wrong verb form

goes

show examples

extinct, it

then

affects other species in nature.

Besides

, science

technology

Correct word choice

and technology

show examples

also

aim to develop

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

products

less

Change preposition

in less

show examples

harmful and eco-friendly

environment

Fix the agreement mistake

environments

show examples

to stop climate change to ensure

our

Change the word

the

show examples

generation

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

same

Correct article usage

the same

show examples

opportunities that we have. In conclusion, I strongly disagree that the most valuable aim of science should be to improve

human’s

Change noun form

human

show examples

lives

. We should consider the outcome coming after irresponsible development. Because it is not only non-ethical,

harmful

Correct word choice

and harmful

show examples

to our

environment

, but it

also

Add a missing verb

is also

show examples

Correct article usage

a threats

show examples

threats

Correct subject-verb agreement

threat

show examples

our

Change the word

the

show examples

generation

Submitted by poiiuyou1 on Mon Apr 22 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement

Develop your arguments further with more specific examples and elaborate on how these examples support your viewpoint.

Coherence & Cohesion

Use a variety of linking words to connect your ideas more smoothly and help with the flow of your essay.

Task Achievement

Be cautious with generalizations unless they are backed up with factual information. Providing sources or studies can enhance your credibility.

Task Achievement

Try to maintain a neutral tone, especially when discussing potentially controversial topics. Balance your argument by acknowledging counterpoints.

General

Review grammar and punctuation to ensure clarity. Small errors can distract from the overall message of your essay.

Task Achievement

You successfully addressed the prompt, showcasing a balanced view on the topic.

Coherence & Cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion are clear and effectively frame your essay.

Task Achievement

You engage with the complexity of the topic well, indicating a high level of critical thinking.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
37Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

247 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

advancement
innovations
sustainability
renewable energy
biotechnology
quality of life
environmental issues
climate change
pollution
technological
efficiency
sustainable practices
food security
agricultural
crop yields
nutrition
economic development
industries
poverty reduction
education
knowledge dissemination
informed decision-making

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the most important aim of science should be to improve people's live. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

Too much emphasis is given to education on the young. More government money should be spent on the free time activity of young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays many people have access to computers on a wide basis and a large number of children play computer games. What are the negative impacts of playing computer games and what can be done to minimize the bad effects?

TASK 2 (Academic and General Training) You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Many people have difficulty maintaining a healthy diet. What are the causes of this problem? How could it be solved? Write at least 250 words.

Demand for food is increasing worldwide. what are Causes and Solutions for this problem?

Some people think that zoos are cruel and should be closed down. Others, however, believe that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+