Professionals such as doctors, nurses and teachers should be paid more than sports and entertainment personalities. To what extent do you agree?
Should
professinals
Correct your spelling
professionals
such
as doctors
, nurses
and teachers
get a higher salary than the ones working in the sports and entertainment branches? Of course
both of these Add a comma
course,
type
of occupations Change to a plural noun
types
is
important in different ways, but to Correct subject-verb agreement
are
me
it is given. I do agree that the professions involved in the Add a comma
me,
well being
of our Add a hyphen
well-being
society
should be paid more. But some people may ask why?
Change the punctuation
.
Firstly
, doctors
, nurses
and teachers
are professions that can change lifes
. Correct your spelling
lives
For instance
, doctors
and Change noun form
doctors'
doctor's
nurses
work can be a matter of life or Change noun form
nurses'
nurse's
dead
. Our whole Replace the word
death
society
depend
on that we have educated Change the verb form
depends
residences
Replace the word
residents
that
can help us when we get Correct pronoun usage
who
indjured
. And with that said, the Correct your spelling
injured
affect
Correct your spelling
effect
teachers
have on us is huge. The work they put in influence
all our Fix the agreement mistake
influences
cilitizen
and they deserve a high salary.
Correct your spelling
citizens
citizen
Secondly
, without the work of doctors
and nurses
the Add a comma
nurses,
sport
industry would not even be functional. Change the noun form
sports
For example
, athleates
are often Correct your spelling
athletes
hurted
Correct your spelling
hurt
from
their Change preposition
by
ocupation
. If we would not have Correct your spelling
occupation
a
Correct article usage
apply
well developed
Add a hyphen
well-developed
hospitalities
all the people in Replace the word
hospitals
brasches
Correct your spelling
branches
such
as,
sports would never be able to recover from their Remove the comma
apply
indjury
. Our whole Correct your spelling
injury
society
is depended
on Replace the word
dependent
a
good working healthcare and it should be a självklarhet that they should earn more Remove the article
apply
then
others.
Replace the word
than
To conclude
, our society
is depended
on Replace the word
dependent
ocupations
Correct your spelling
occupations
such
as,
Remove the comma
apply
nurses
, doctors
and teachers
. Without them
we would not be educated or Add a comma
them,
healty
. A well functional Correct your spelling
healthy
healtcare
is not only the source of a good sports team, but a Correct your spelling
healthcare
well being
humanity. It should be given that the ones working with our health should earn more money.Add a hyphen
well-being
Submitted by clara.m.schafer on
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Language Accuracy
Try to ensure consistent spelling and grammatical accuracy throughout your essay to enhance readability.
Depth of Supporting Examples
Where possible, include more varied examples and evidences to strengthen your arguments.
Cohesion and Coherence
Focus on the coherence of your paragraphs by connecting your ideas more clearly and using transition words effectively.
Introduction & Conclusion
Good introduction and conclusion structure, effectively framing your argument.
Task Response
You've successfully maintained focus on the topic, effectively arguing why certain professions should be paid more.
Logical Structure
Logical progression of ideas, with paragraphs clearly dedicated to distinct points in your argument.
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