Most teenagers today own a smartphone. Provide your opinion to discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

#teenagers #smartphone

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In the contemporary era, many

adoloscents

Correct your spelling

adolescents

have

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

smartphone

Fix the agreement mistake

smartphones

show examples

. There are many advantages and disadvantages of

this

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trend and

this

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essay will examine

further

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some of the upsides and downsides associated with the development. Primarily,

parents

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buy smartphones for their

kids

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to communicate actively with them

while

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they are away from home. To exemplify, if a

school

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student

gets

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late from his tuition class, he or she updates his

parents

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through phone or text message. It is a great way to keep

parents

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informed of the whereabouts of their

kids

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when they are naive at

this

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age and need guidance at every moment of their lives.

This

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is one of the reasons why the

school

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authorities cannot completely ban the usage of phones.

Next,

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the

school

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students generally say that they need these devices to take pictures of

Use synonyms

school

Correct article usage

the school

show examples

notice board or some notes that their teacher has written for them which they could refer

whenever

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to whenever

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in need.

For example

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, if there is a notice on the

school

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notice board regarding any change in the schedule

then

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the students can have a photo of that and can save it for

the

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apply

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future reference.

On the contrary

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, there are many situations when

parents

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and teachers realise that

kids

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are using these devices in

Correct article usage

the

show examples

wrong way.

For example

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kids

Use synonyms

keep

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apply

show examples

scrolling social media reels for hours and do not keep track of their time.

Hence

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, the best time of their lives gets wasted. There are many distractions which could easily allure an individual towards these phones and can make them an addict.

Besides

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this

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, sometimes the content available on the phone is not appropriate for teens to view. It can be illustrated by an example, there is no censor for adult movies in some countries and teens can easily access

such

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websites and watch

these

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them

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when they are not the intended audience for

such

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videos. So, the ease of access to

such

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content has become a trouble for their guardians.

To conclude

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kids

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can utilize

this

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technology in a positive way

such

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as taking notes or even

to stay

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staying

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in touch with

parents

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Although

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, a negative side is

also

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there like wasting time and watching inappropriate videos which should be

avioded

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avoided

Thus

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, teens have to understand both sides of the viewpoint

then

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should

take

Verb problem

making

show examples

a decision

on owning

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to own

show examples

a phone.

Submitted by Kiran on Tue Apr 23 2024

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task achievement

Your essay clearly presents both advantages and disadvantages of teenagers owning smartphones, showing a good understanding of the task. Aim to further enhance your argument by exploring these points in more depth and possibly introducing a wider range of ideas for a higher score.

coherence cohesion

You've structured your essay effectively, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. To improve, consider linking your ideas more explicitly within and between paragraphs using a wider range of cohesive devices.

task achievement

Your main points are well supported by examples, which strengthens your argument. To push your score higher, you might consider providing more detailed explanations or considering counter-arguments to add depth to your analysis.

task achievement

You have provided a balanced view by discussing both advantages and disadvantages, which is crucial for a complete response to the prompt.

task achievement

The examples you've used, such as parents being informed about their children's whereabouts and the misuse of smartphones by teens, are relevant and effectively illustrate your points.

coherence cohesion

Your conclusion effectively summarizes the essay, reinforcing your arguments and reflecting on the implications of teenage smartphone ownership.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

390 words

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Most teenagers today own a smartphone. Provide your opinion to discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

Your opinion

Some people think that managers alone should make decisions in the company, while others thing that employee should be involved in the decision-making process too. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people say it is important to keep your home and your workplace tidy, with everything organised and in the correct place. What is your opinion about this?

nowdays, many people choose to be self- employes, rather than to work for a company or organaisation. why might this be the case? what could be the disadvantages of being self employed?

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our times is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.