Some people believe that the government should support the funds for the arts, while some other people suggest that the money should be used for public health and education. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #government #support #funds #arts #money #health #education

Nowadays, there are various debates about where and how the government should spend money. Some people believe that

art

is important for any society, so authorities should consider it when they want to allocate a budget, but

on the contrary

other

Fix the agreement mistake

others

show examples

think public

health

and education are more essential for

population

Add an article

the population

show examples

. The importance of

art

in our nation is undeniable. It is one of the key elements

to depict

Change preposition

in depicting

show examples

cultures

Change preposition

around

show examples

the globe.

For instance

, If the government find it valuable enough to spend money they will see how their country is becoming influenced positively by absorbing more tourists.

Because usually

Correct word choice

Usually

show examples

tourists who are looking for

art

galleries or museums will be charged.

However

, there is no doubt that

Change noun form

human

show examples

human’s

Change noun form

human

show examples

health

and

Correct your spelling

well-being

show examples

wellbeing

Correct your spelling

well-being

show examples

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

much more vital than

art

As a result

art

boosts

countries

Change noun form

countries'

country's

show examples

economy

Fix the agreement mistake

economies

show examples

and

help

Correct subject-verb agreement

helps

show examples

them

Verb problem

apply

show examples

spread their culture all over the world.

In contrast

, some opponents are against

Change preposition

apply

show examples

spending

for

Change preposition

show examples

art

while

health

conditions and

improved

Correct article usage

an improved

show examples

education system are more beneficial. If people feel

health

Replace the word

healthy

show examples

and motivated the level of life expectancy in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society will be raised.

Additionally

, developing schools and universities to grow expert workforces,

also

can increase financial status in societies.

For example

, a country with

healthful

Correct article usage

a healthful

show examples

population and knowledgable individuals will be more powerful than others. In conclusion,

art

is a valuable sector for extending our culture to other countries, but

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

should not neglect of public

health

and education system.

As a result

, nobody can underestimate their worth, so all nations should make a balance when they are classifying their budget.

Submitted by 876764430 on Wed Apr 24 2024

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Task Achievement

Make sure to directly address the question asked in your introduction and conclusion to clearly state your opinion. This will help in presenting a well-rounded argument.

Task Achievement

To further strengthen your essay, you could provide more specific examples and statistics to support your arguments. This makes your points more persuasive and grounded in reality.

Coherence and Cohesion

Strive for clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to guide the reader through your argument. This helps in maintaining a logical flow and enhancing the overall coherence of your essay.

Coherence and Cohesion

Try to use a wider range of linking words and phrases to seamlessly connect ideas and paragraphs. This will enhance the readability and flow of your essay.

Task Achievement

The essay explores both views as requested by the prompt, demonstrating a balanced consideration of the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion

The introduction and conclusion effectively frame the essay, establishing the topic and summarizing the main points and your stance.

Coherence and Cohesion

Main ideas are supported with explanations, although more detailed examples would enhance the argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

261 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that the government should support the funds for the arts, while some other people suggest that the money should be used for public health and education. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Some believe that students should begin learning a language very early in school while others think these subjects should be taught later. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

In many countries around the world young people decide to leave their parents’ home once they finish school. They start living on their own or sharing a home with friends. Is this a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples

some people find it beneficial to send young children to nursery school before they go to primary school. while others think that it is good to keep them with their family. discuss both views and give your opinion.

In the past , when students did a university degree they tended to study in their own country.Nowadays they have more opportunity to study abroad. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development

Traditional schooling is out of date, boring and stifles natural talents. various professionals have pushed for an educational revolution. Are there alternatives in the educational system. Is traditional education doing more harm than good? Give reasons for your answer.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+