IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Write a letter to your local council that the road in front of your house is damaged. In your letter, you should: tell him your name and where you are living describe the problem suggest what you want him to do for it.

#council #road #front #house #name
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Dear Sir/Ma'am, My name is Kulbeer Kaur Bal residing in Aniruddha apartment, building number 33, room number 5, 5th floor, Ulwe, 410206. In the letter, I wanted to inform you that there is a pothole in front of our society gate. So, there are major problems occurring because of potholes. Potholes occur
due to
 the damaged roads, many trucks and heavy vehicles pass by my society, it is becoming a severe issue day by day and people are getting late for their office jobs because of heavy traffic. We have informed the higher authorities about the problem but they have done half of the work and left in between. I would suggest you repair the damaged area as soon as possible and that would be a great help. Yours Sincerely, Kulbeer Kaur Bal
Submitted by jatinderpanaich328 on

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task achievement
To improve task achievement, provide more detailed suggestions for resolving the issue rather than a general request for repair. Mentioning specific actions like filling the potholes, resurfacing the road, or regular maintenance checks could enhance your response.
coherence & cohesion
Your letter effectively organizes information logically, but incorporating transitional phrases between ideas could make the flow even smoother, enhancing the coherence of your letter.
task response
Your letter effectively introduces the issue at hand, outlining the main problem and its impact on the community, which shows a strong task response.
tone
The greeting and closing of your letter are appropriately formal, fitting the context of a letter to the council, showing good command of the suitable writing tone.
structure
The structure of your letter, with distinct sections for introduction, description of the problem, and suggesting a solution, showcases good coherence and cohesion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Grievance
  • Deterioration
  • Hazardous
  • Impede
  • Inconvenience
  • Potholes
  • Cracks
  • Collapsed
  • Uneven
  • Detour
  • Repair
  • Maintenance
  • Investigation
  • Infrastructure
  • Expenditure
  • Resolution
  • Improvement
  • Community
  • Resident
  • Safety
  • Convenience
  • Traffic congestion
  • Civic
  • Enquiry
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