Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, government should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree.
These days some individuals think environmental
pollution
and housing Use synonyms
problems
should be mitigated by Use synonyms
Use synonyms
government
to avoid illness and disease. In my opinion, I totally agree with Add an article
the government
this
Linking Words
argue
because environmental Replace the word
argument
pollution
including Use synonyms
water
, Use synonyms
Use synonyms
air
Correct word choice
and air
pollution
can Use synonyms
may
affect Remove a modal verb
apply
to
Change preposition
apply
people
's lives harmfully so Use synonyms
that
Correct determiner usage
the
government
need to focus more on tackling the solution.
It is true to admit that nowadays the Use synonyms
problems
of environmental Use synonyms
pollution
and housing Use synonyms
problems
are Use synonyms
controversy
, and it is alarming that Replace the word
controversial
higher
Correct article usage
the higher
level
of Correct article usage
the level
pollution
appears, the more Use synonyms
potention
that Correct your spelling
potential
people
may get illness and from that many Use synonyms
disease
may emerge and affect Change to a plural noun
diseases
to
Change preposition
apply
human's
health. Change noun form
human
Hence
, many efforts of Linking Words
Use synonyms
government
Correct article usage
the government
toprevent
the Correct your spelling
to prevent
problems
, they might cut down the Use synonyms
problems
. Take Use synonyms
air
Use synonyms
pollution
as Use synonyms
the
example, many countries Correct article usage
an
are considered
that the higher level of Wrong verb form
consider
air
Use synonyms
pollution
they have, and the data of those Use synonyms
coutries
reveal that the proportion of Correct your spelling
countries
people
who Use synonyms
get
Verb problem
have
the
Correct article usage
apply
Use synonyms
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
about
breathing and lungs Change preposition
with
are
high alarmingly. For that reason, many countries to advert the Correct subject-verb agreement
is
problem
may focus on propagating the dwellers not to take advantage of utilizing individual transports to decrease the toxic Use synonyms
emission
that they emit Fix the agreement mistake
emissions
for
the Change preposition
into
air
.
It is Use synonyms
also
recognized that Linking Words
environmantal
Correct your spelling
environmental
pollution
as Use synonyms
water
Use synonyms
pollution
can Use synonyms
be
affect Unnecessary verb
apply
to
Change preposition
apply
people
's lives, the Use synonyms
water
may be affected by the Use synonyms
water
including the chemical substances which may be dumped Use synonyms
in to
the Join the words
into
water
can kill Use synonyms
the
marine animals and Correct article usage
apply
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
also
affect Linking Words
to
Change preposition
apply
people
's health. Use synonyms
People
who drink Use synonyms
this
Linking Words
water
may get many diseases and Use synonyms
government
need to tackle Use synonyms
this
Linking Words
problem
.
In conclusion, tackling the Use synonyms
problem
may be the key to Use synonyms
enhance
Wrong verb form
enhancing
the
Correct article usage
apply
people
's lives and health to avoid Use synonyms
the
illness and disease, from that rise the Correct article usage
apply
Correct your spelling
people's
peole's
life Correct your spelling
people's
expantancy
Correct your spelling
expectancy
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Task Achievement
Make sure your introduction clearly states your position on the topic. Your current introduction does a good job, but further clarity could enhance the reader's understanding right from the beginning.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use a range of linking words to better connect your ideas and paragraphs. This will improve the flow of your essay.
Task Achievement
Develop your paragraphs with more specific examples to support your main points. This will strengthen your arguments and make them more convincing.
General Advice
Be mindful of grammatical accuracy and word choice to ensure clarity throughout your essay. Small errors can distract from your message.
Task Achievement
Your essay offers a clear opinion, aligning with the task requirements.
Coherence and Cohesion
You provided a logical flow of ideas, making it easier for readers to follow your arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your viewpoint and reinforces your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.