In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centers or malls to do their shopping. Is this a positive or a negative development?
Not very long ago, big
malls
and shopping centers
Change the spelling
centres
are taking
over small Wrong verb form
took
stores
due to
less consumer flow. I think this
is a positive development because large malls
offers
different brands in one place which reduces people's time and effort.
Change the verb form
offer
Large
shopping complex consists of different Correct article usage
A large
stores
which offers
a wide range to Change the verb form
offer
it's
customers. Often, people love to purchase from different brands, since they can find Replace the word
its
it
in one spot Correct pronoun usage
them
there by
saving time. Another benefit of visiting these shopping plazas is they provide ample parking which is another convenience for the people. Correct your spelling
thereby
For instance
, Yorkdale mall
is so enormous that it consists of Capitalize word
Mall
huge
number of brands and Change the article
a huge
the huge
a
spacious parking for Remove the article
apply
it's
customers.
First of all, the biggest impact of these Replace the word
its
malls
can be noticed as the small-scale stores
are getting closed. As consumers have to visit various shops for thier
needs. Correct your spelling
their
On the other hand
, since the large stores
offers
more parking, it often tends to traffic congestion which in turn leads to environmental pollution. Change the verb form
offer
Lastly
, as
these shopping Correct word choice
apply
centers
Change the spelling
centres
offers
different hubs Change the verb form
offer
such
as entertainment, food
court Correct word choice
and food
area
which attract thieves making it a security concern. As it is very easy for them in these large gatherings. Fix the agreement mistake
areas
For example
, every year there is an increase in the crime rate at shopping plazas according to
recent news reports.
To conclude
, even tough
there are some disadvantages of shopping Correct your spelling
though
malls
, local customers still prefer to visit them instead
of local shops as they provide more convenience.Submitted by hassan05.quadri on
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Introduction
Provide a clear thesis statement to present your position more directly.
Body Paragraphs
Expand on your examples with more detail to demonstrate how they support your points.
Task Response
Work on presenting a more balanced view by equally discussing the positive and negative aspects.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider using a range of linking words to better connect your ideas and paragraphs for improved cohesion.
Logical Structure
You've effectively organized your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Task Response
Good job in presenting both sides of the argument, even if one side is favored.
Supported Main Points
Your essay adequately covers the topic and provides relevant examples, enhancing your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
