The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features,, and make comparisons where relevent.

#process #sugar #cane #summarise #information #features #comparisons #relevent

The chart illustrates the process of how

sugar

is made from

sugar

cane.

Overall

, it is obvious that there are totally 7 steps that can be categorized into 3 stages: material preparation, processing and drying. First and

formost

Correct your spelling

foremost

sugar

canes are grown from 12 to 18 months before being harvested by farmers or harvesting machines. The

sugar

canes are

then

put into a crusher, where they will be crushed into juice for the next stage. During the process stage, the juice undergoes 2 different steps. They are purified in a filter with limestone. The filter

are

Change the verb form

show examples

then

employed to change the juice into a mixture. The mixture is

subsequently

evaporated in a burning evaporator and

become

Change the verb form

becomes

show examples

syrup. Once the processing stage is completed,

sugar

crystals from

syrup

Correct article usage

the syrup

show examples

will be separated by a centrifuge machine.

Finally

, the

sugar

crystals are

dryed

Correct your spelling

dried

and cooked, marking the conclusion of the course.

Submitted by k2englishcenter on Thu Apr 25 2024

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words sugar with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

148 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features,, and make comparisons where relevent.

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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