Modern lifestyles are completely different from the way people lived in the past. Some people think the changes have been very positive, while others believe they have been negative Discuss both these points of view and give your opinion

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In recent decades, the way

people

Use synonyms

live their lives has been characterized by advancements in

technology

Use synonyms

and changes in social life. Some individuals believe the changes impacted positive results,

while

Linking Words

others think reversely.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss both sides and argue in favour of the latter because the modern

lifestyle

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drives

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a sedentary

lifestyle

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, leading to several health problems.

To begin

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with, the quickly growing of digital

technology

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drives

people

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to engage with others easily since communication become easier and faster than ever before. To illustrate, relying on smartphones

allow

Correct subject-verb agreement

allows

show examples

users to make an overseas communication in a matter of seconds, which was a difficult thing several years before. It could happen because of the advent of communication

technology

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such

Linking Words

as social media and chat applications.

Additionally

Linking Words

, it is

also

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expected that in the future the way

people

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communicate with each other will be supported by the more sophisticated media.

However

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, the more advanced the

technology

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the fewer

people

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would be conducting physical activities, leading to a sedentary

lifestyle

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and many health problems.

For instance

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, based on recent research conducted in Indonesia, it is evident that 80% of young

people

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tend to fulfil their daily basis instantly

such

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as ordering food and shopping from

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

online applications.

Furthermore

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, they have a lack of awareness of consuming healthy food and engaging in regular exercise, which can cause

Change preposition

apply

show examples

lifestyle

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diseases that can lower their quality of life. In conclusion,

while

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modern lifestyles have some positive impact, it

also

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causes some downsides in terms of health problems. From my way of thinking, it is highly recommended that individuals use the advancement of

technology

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wisely and consider having a healthy

lifestyle

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such

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as exercising regularly and consuming nutritious food.

ru.kabiru.biruThu Apr 25 2024

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Grammar & Style

Be mindful of small errors in grammar and word choice that may impact the clarity of your arguments. For example, consider revising phrases like 'the quickly growing of digital technology drives' to 'the rapid growth of digital technology allows' for greater clarity.

Development and Support

Enhance the effectiveness of your argument by expanding on examples with more detail and context. This will make your argument more persuasive and comprehensive.

Sentence Structure

Work on varying your sentence structures to add complexity and interest to your writing, ensuring a more engaging and sophisticated essay.

Task Response

Your essay effectively addresses both views of the topic, providing a balanced discussion before stating your own opinion. This demonstrates a good understanding of the task requirements.

Coherence & Cohesion

You have structured your essay logically, with clear introductions and conclusions, making your arguments easy to follow. This enhances the coherence and cohesion of your response.

Example Use

Using relevant examples, such as the impact of technology on communication and lifestyle, strengthens your arguments and demonstrates your ability to use specific information to support your points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

287 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Sedentary lifestyle
Technological advancements
Globalization
Cultural exchange
Nuclear family
Extended family
Life expectancy
Healthcare improvements
mental health
Environmental degradation
Traditional family structures
Industrialization
Urbanization
Consumption patterns

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Modern lifestyles are completely different from the way people lived in the past. Some people think the changes have been very positive, while others believe they have been negative Discuss both these points of view and give your opinion

Your opinion

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. others argue that it is better to try and improve such situation. Discuss both these views and give your own.

Having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having more free time. Discuss both views and state your opinion.

Holding international games such as olympics is an exciting event. Some people think that it has positive effect, while others argue that it is a waste of money. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

In many countries, childhood obesity is a growing problem. What are the reasons for this and what can individuals and governments do to tackle the problem?