IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

It is more important for a building to serve a purpose than to look beautiful. Architects should not worry about producing building as a work of art. Do you agree or disagree ?

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In the modern era, some groups of society think the
apperance
Correct your spelling
appearance
 of a structure does not matter at all
while
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 others disagree. I personally endorse the latter standpoint and I'm going to explain why in the rest of
this
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 essay.
To begin
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 with, gorgeous
building
Fix the agreement mistake
buildings
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 give a new spirit to the city.
Firstly
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, the beauty of structures can lure a lot of tourists and stimulate the local economy which can lead to erosion of financial problems.
For example
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, many individuals visit Qatar just because of
Khalifa
Correct article usage
the Khalifa
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 Tower and its height and glory and spend an inordinate amount of money on that.
Secondly
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, some buildings are built in some ways that show their functions which can help new people
to
Verb problem
apply
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recognize them better.
Finally
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, building creative constructions can benefit the architects as well, because
after
Add the comma(s)
, after
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 that, they can take
much
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on much
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 more extensive projects and have a constructive impact on the earth.
In addition
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 to all the points that were mentioned, the beauty of a construction can
effect
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affect
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 our bodies
as well as
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 the environment. Old and dark-colour buildings can negatively affect our mental health.
Therefore
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,
this
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 is the reason
of
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for
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 more prevalence of mental disorders among people who reside in older neighbourhoods.
Additionally
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, the way that an
apartments
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apartment
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 looks can influence the environment, too. Dark apartments,
for instance
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, absorb more heat from the sunlight compared to light ones, which can deteriorate
the
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apply
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global warming and climate change
condotion
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condition
conditions
.
To conclude
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, I believe good-looking offices and houses always are ahead of ugly ones in terms of efficiency,
eco-friendly
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eco-friendliness
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 and
othe
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other
 aspects that were mentioned.

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coherence cohesion
Work on varying your sentence structures to enhance readability and flow.
task achievement
Ensure to proofread for minor grammatical errors and to refine your argument's clarity.
task achievement
Incorporate a wider range of vocabulary to more accurately express your ideas and to strengthen your argument.
task achievement
Consider balancing both sides of the argument initially before stating your agreement or disagreement for a fully developed response.
coherence cohesion
Effectively introduces and concludes the essay, establishing a clear stance.
task achievement
Uses relevant examples like Qatar's Khalifa Tower to support points, enhancing the argument.
coherence cohesion
Logically organizes ideas, making the essay easy to follow.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Aesthetics
  • Usability
  • Wellbeing
  • Sustainable
  • Eco-friendly
  • Energy efficiency
  • Practicality
  • Psychological wellbeing
  • Urban landscape
  • Structural integrity
  • Natural disasters
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