Many people these days have computer, laptops, telephone at their home for work. Do you think, working from home has more advantages or disadvantages?

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In these modern days, people often times have their gadgets at
their
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apply
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home
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and
used
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use
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for
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them for
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working from
home
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.
Although
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work
Wrong verb form
working
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from
home
Use synonyms
have
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has
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severals
Correct your spelling
several
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disadvantages, I believe the benefits outweigh the drawbacks. In
this
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essay, I will discuss both
of
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apply
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the
benefit
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benefits
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and
drawback
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drawbacks
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of
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work
Wrong verb form
working
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from
home
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. On the one hand,
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work
Wrong verb form
working
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from
home
Use synonyms
separate
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separates
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people away with their colleagues and could result
into
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in
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the
Correct article usage
a
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lack of emotional connection with colleagues.
Furthermore
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,
this
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would affect the enjoyment of working with others and
lose
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apply
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the chance to talk freely about
work
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.
For instance
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, I am a remote worker and because of
absence
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the absence
an absence
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of
face to face
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face-to-face
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interaction, I'm unable to be really close emotionally with my coworkers, resulting not the best teamwork.
Consequently
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,
create
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creates
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a negative working environment.
On the other hand
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, remote
work
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provide
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provides
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more flexibility. In some workfields, it's just not really important to be doing
job
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a job
the job
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on site.
For example
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, software engineers
are
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do
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not really
needed
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need
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to be physically in the office. Especially, most
of
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apply
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software engineers are introverts and often times they would be more productive by remote
work
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.
Moreover
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, by doing things remotely,
employee
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the employee
an employee
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can preserve their energy,
instead
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of
spend
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spending
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it on their travel to
office
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the office
an office
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.
To conclude
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, in my
perspective
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perspective,
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virtual
work
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bring
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brings
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a lot of advantages and
outweigh
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outweighs
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its disadvantages.
Linking Words
Although
Correct word choice
However
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, some social events
are
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apply
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still
needed
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need
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to be
a
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apply
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media for the employees to have bonding time.
These kind
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This kind
These kinds
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of events could boost their teamwork and create
positive
Add an article
a positive
show examples
working environment.
Submitted by ridhokholis9a on

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Task Achievement
Your essay presents a clear position with a balanced discussion of advantages and disadvantages. Consider integrating more specific examples to strengthen your argument and make your points more vivid.
Coherence/Cohesion
Work on varying your sentence structures to enhance readability and engagement. This will also showcase your linguistic range.
Language Proficiency
Be attentive to minor typographical and grammatical errors, as they can slightly hinder the clarity of your message. Proofreading can help you minimize these.
Introduction & Conclusion
You've effectively introduced and concluded your essay, clearly stating your standpoint.
Logical Structure
Good job on structuring your essay logically, with distinct paragraphs for each main point.
Task Response
You successfully discussed both sides of the argument, providing a balanced view.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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