In many cities, planners tend to arrange shops, schools, offices and homes in specific areas and separate them from each other. Do you think the advantages of this policy outweigh the disadvantages?
There are areas in which urbanization specialists centralise all main
acivities
of the city. In Correct your spelling
activities
this
essay
I will evaluate Add a comma
essay,
on
why, I believe that Change preposition
apply
this
situation brings more pros than cons for society.
To begin
with, town arrangements are made in a way that if the citizen
want to use multiple services, they will be Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
in
a close distance Change preposition
at
to
each other. Change preposition
from
For example
, parents may pick up their kid from school, do groceries and go back to their house in one drive. The way it is planned lets them to
do more stuff and Change the verb form
apply
safe
time. Replace the word
save
Moreover
, spreading towns from rural areas allows us to have both busy and calm parts of the country. Certainly, living in a peaceful environment far away from the office helps some people to separate private life from work.
On the other hand
, it creates difficulties for those who live in villages. If they forgot to buy a small thing, they would have to struggle with finding
any shop near Change preposition
to find
by
their house. It Change preposition
apply
also
decrease
the Change the verb form
decreases
variousity
of Correct your spelling
curiosity
enterntaiments
for villagers without Correct your spelling
entertainment
entertainments
the
driving licence. Correct article usage
a
For instance
, they usually cannot go to a mall or theatre without a car. Therefore
, the current arrangement does not work for lower
social class. Correct article usage
the lower
However
, it is worth mentioning that there are other options for them such
as bus or taxi.
To sum up
, some parts of the cities are more industralised
than others. Correct your spelling
industrialised
industrialized
However
, it leads adults to safe
time that they spend on travelling and Replace the word
save
do
not mix office and daily life. Unnecessary verb
apply
Nevertheless
, those who have no access to transport would struggle with travelling. Overall
, I believe that there is
enough additional transfer options that the present separation of cities is Change the verb form
are
benefitial
for the local community.Correct your spelling
beneficial
Submitted by Aga
on
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Task Achievement
Ensure to provide a balanced argument by discussing both sides equally before making a conclusion.
Coherence & Cohesion
Work on varying your sentence structures to enhance readability and flow. Try to blend simple and complex sentences.
Coherence & Cohesion
Pay attention to minor spelling and grammatical errors, as they can slightly affect the clarity of your message. For example, 'safe time' should be 'save time', and 'variousity' should be 'variety'.
Task Achievement
Consider expanding on your examples and explanations to further strengthen your arguments and provide a deeper insight.
Task Achievement
Your essay presented a clear opinion, stating that the benefits outweigh the disadvantages.
Task Achievement
You effectively used examples to support your points, which helped in illustrating your arguments.
Coherence & Cohesion
The structure of your essay was logical, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
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